I put mine, securities in you.
following the lead of your affection
I unraveled like string to a spinning wheel
unaware yet, trusting was I
how juvenile
Fate strikes your most honest hues in light
revealing mimicry and deception
while you still cried I was the exception
unaware yet, trusting was I
how juvenile
I called you Romeo while you were calling me Ophelia
trying to fill Juliet's shoes- I left what was mine.
Alas, you are but a Hamlet; entangled in the predispositions in your existence
while I was entangled in you
unaware yet, trusting was I
how juvenile
then all was lost
and I tried to tend to my own as you tended to yours- effortlessly
and I never knew yours had a Maria Reynolds to tend to effortlessly
betrayed yet not completely fair to say why
thus I realized I was a Liza and you are an Alexander
I was never Juliet like you claimed endlessly
I was never Angelica who was your one that got away
I was never your Hera and
there was never going to be a our story and kingdom
And like Liza I remove myself from the picture
let you wonder forever how I truly felt when you noticed my absence
you have lost your clout over my own internal affairs and self judgement
and then I realized I am no Liza
I am not defined by an Icarus such as yourself
who flies to close to the sun only to be burned
I am not concluded simply by a satyr Marsyas
who spends your time boasting but loses -in fate -to the Apollos of this world
And when you cross your Apollo- I will not be there
For I am not and never was juvenile
but hopeful
but I have learned- being hopeful for you is like being hopeful for Ares to commit to world peace.
I was never naive
but trusting
Should I have known you were a Brutus- A Judas from the start
I never would have laid down so much
But I always was a good soul
hoping for the best and trusting you and your gilded affections
I was and still am not ever perfect
but I will be perfectly fine without you
because I am the Hamilton-
not because my choices in affection because I would never follow in your dim steps
but because there is still a million things I haven't done
just you wait.
