Mindlessly

Chapter 8.

The long black blades of my ceiling fan spin rapidly above me. I suppose I've been staring forever now, but not actually visualizing much. I see green eyes. I see warm lips pressed against mine, encasing my lips within them. I see big rough hands holding my face close. I see Harry and I am lost. The spinning continues and doesn't seen to ever break. It's all becoming a blur, the blades have mushed together and I feel my soft sheets against my skin, my smooth legs surrounded by the silly sheets, the little hairs on my arms tucked beneath my pillow, every muscle has begun to relax. I feel my eyes becoming heavy, my mind clears and I finally succumb to my exhaustion.

...

"Mummy, I'm home!" Walking slowly through the front door, I smell the food in the kitchen. It's taken over the walkway of the home.

"Darling! How was your day?" She asks, taking me into her arms.

Her hair is pulled up away from her face, beautiful blonde ringlets fall from her ponytail down to her mid back. She's wearing her favorite yellow apron and her music is playing through our little home.

"It was good mummy, how was yours?" I take my seat at our long table next to my baby brother, kissing his little cheeks. He's slobbering all over himself, in high seat, blabbering meaningless little words.

"Just peachy, Margaret. Dinner is almost ready, go wash up." Her warm smile fills my heart to to the rim.

My mum does it all. She raises the 2 of us, one teen and one toddler, she keeps up with her photography and always has a hot meal ready for my dad when he arrives home.

"It's delicious, darling!" My dad tells my mother between bites of potato and chicken, and she smiles to him adoringly from across the table. 20 years they've been married, childhood lovers. They traveled the world together, he was her best friend as a child and they fell in love in their teen years.

"So daddy, today at school, Mrs.Dokerin, my mathematics teacher told me I'm one of the smartest students in my year. It's a kind of a big deal." I say flicking potato around my plate.

"You don't say, Margaret? Well that's just lovely. I'm very proud of you sweetheart, my star little pupil." His hand is stroking the back of my hair and he kisses the top of my head.

Mitchell begins throwing a tantrum in his high chair and my mum gets up to soothe him. I take the opportunity to jump up from the table and escape back to my room, without such luck.

"Oh no, no. Not so hasty, love. Get back in here and dump ya plate Margaret." Mum scolds me and slowly I walk back to the kitchen and clean my plate.

"Sorry mum." I tell her.

Finally getting to my room I take out my diary and write about my day. A little habit I formed watching mum write down little thoughts before bed.

Bed time is always the same routine, mum and dad always tuck me in together, kiss my cheeks together and leave the room together shutting off my light. But tonight, daddy has to work and it's just mum.

"Sweet dreams, my darling." Her soothing voice washes over me and she places small little kisses all over my forehead.

"I love you so much mummy." My arms wrap around her trying to hold her forever but she wiggles her way out playfully

"Love you more than my own life, Margaret." She shuts out the light and closes my door.

I wake up coughing. The smoke is seeking into my room through the vent and under the door, it's thick and hot making it hard to breathe and it's burning my eyes.