My Life! :D

Bastille- The Draw (My lyrical Interpretation)

Inspired by charasheartlocket chapter where they relate their life to migraine this is me relating my life to this song as well as giving my interpretation. 

Bold= The actual lyrics

Regular Text= What I'm saying.

Let's begin!

In my left hand there is the familiar,

If I look at the "left path"I'll see everything I've known and know I'll be safe there.

In my right hand there's the great unknown

If I look to the "right path" I see new things. I see great adventures and opportunities.

I can see the madly different grass there

The unknown path has so many new thing that if I choose to go right I can find great things. I might find something better than where I am now. I could become better. I could change the world.

But I'm drawn to wilder nights at home

Despite realizing this, I still usually end up staying home and safe. Not taking risks out of anxiety and my fear of failure.

Despite it being familiar the nights can turn pretty wild in my head as my brain go down pretty dark paths and it can stink.

Don't listen to your friends,

See the despair behind their eyes

Don't listen to your friends

They only care once in awhile

No matter what my friends say, I can't help but feel as if they don't care. I see how they look at me. I'm just someone to pity. Even if they did ever care, it only be for a little while.

It's partially because of them, but partially because I have anxieties regarding people I actually like.

This also reminds of those people who act like they care about you....as long as you're helping them, not them helping you.

It really doesn't help I have a long history of making friends than the stop hanging out with me because they found someone new. It really stinks because that usually ens up with me being alone as well as the fact that I get attached easily and I'm super accepting and trusting (well I was more trusting when I was younger, but still) so a bunch of people you trusted and truly felt a connection with leaving, really has some negative effects on you. (Credit to middle school, I actually do have people to hang out with who haven't gone anywhere.....yet)

I can feel the draw

I can feel it pulling me back

It's pulling me back, it's pulling me

I can feel the draw

I can feel it pulling me back

It's pulling me back, it's pulling me

I can feel a force, my anxiety, holding me back from what I want to do. I can tell it's taking over my life but I can't help it. I'm just so anxious about everyone around me not caring and I'm scared I'll just be a failure in life.

Are you drifting way beyond what's normal?

If you haven't noticed, I'm not exactly normal.

I'm aware my thoughts aren't normal. I know I'm weird and awkward. I don't need to be reminded.

'Cause round your mind rings the words that they would say

My mind constantly thinks what people would say if I said or did a certain thing. Or things they would say behind my back If I told them how I feel.

On my worse days this can make me scared to be me.

When you go home everything looks different

When I'm home, I lose the one thing that keeps me going; being able to escape into my friends and listening to their issues and helping them. I can distract myself by helping them. And when they are all laughing I can escape into their joy.

Also when I go "home" from being online or reading books, by being put into the real world, I lose my ability to escape by reading, writing, or watching videos.

And you're scared of being left behind

One of my worse fears is being truly alone, or even worse being left by them. I don't want to be alone at all.

Just listen to your friends

Trust that their fair look in their eyes

My actual friends really do care. I can look and their eyes and see they care.

Just listen to your friends

They only care and hope you're alright

They want me to be okay. If only I could remember this when my mind gets

really bad.

Plus I think of you guys as my friends I can tell from your support that you do really want me to do well.

[3x]

I can feel the draw

I can feel it pulling me back

It's pulling me back, it's pulling me

I can feel the draw

I can feel it pulling me back

It's pulling me back, it's pulling me

I can feel the draw

I can feel it pulling me back

It's pulling me back, it's pulling me

I can feel the draw

The draw, the draw, the draw

The draw it just keeps grabbing me and pulling me in. It tells me not to trust anyone. It tells me no one cares. No matter how hard I fight the thoughts it keeps grabbing me, and pulling me down the rabbit hole. It sucks, it makes me feel hopeless.

But I'm still not alone. I have people (irl) who really care about me.

And I have you guys. Your support really helps. All the reads, comments, votes truly amaze me.

I love you guys I really do.

Thanks for everything

Also listen to the song, I could never do it justice.