Porcelain

Entry #5

September 6th, 2017

I don't know what to do. Indra and I got in this huge fight about Jason. She "called me out" for not spending enough time with her. So apparently now I'm a bad friend. I don't want to lose a friend when I don't even have that many to begin with. I'm moving in with Jason for a little while, just to let things settle with Indra. But I honestly don't know if she wants me to go back.

I hate seeing her mad at me, but I have the right to hang out with my boyfriend. She even said that me moving in with him for like a week is "taking it too fast". She doesn't understand my relationship. She keeps trying to get involved, but it's not her relationship to "fix". I just don't understand why she gets mad at me because I'm happy. Is she so miserable that the thought of her friends being happy makes her upset?

Jason is happy though, so at least one outlet of my life is normal. He's actually pretty glad that Indra and I aren't talking right now. He said she's a stressor on our relationship and that I shouldn't go crawling back to her. I went to his apartment crying and he said that it's weak to cry over someone so horrible. I guess he's right, she isn't worth my time. Although it kind of hurt when he told me I was over reacting, I can't help it when I'm upset.

I need to get a job soon; Jason said that if I want to live with him I need to contribute. So I guess I'll apply at a couple restaurants or something. I just don't want my academics to suffer if I'm working all the time. Having extra cash won't hurt though. It's another one of those oh well situations. I just need to get to bed; sleep will help me feel better.