Just a few words...

False boy

As I grew up, I was called "gay" a "faggot", a "girl". I didn't go one day without being called one of those things. I was called that by my haters, and by the ones I loved. You don't know what pain is until one of your "best" friends turn on you, and make you cry to sleep without even realizing it.
But as I got older, I learned that the words they spoke, weren't false. Their words, were words of a broken prophecy. A prophecy I didn't want for myself.
But as it so happened, I came to terms with myself, I discovered that I indeed did have feelings for the same sex. And I thought it stopped there, I thought I was alright, I could handle me liking the same sex. After all, I knew my situation was much better than most. I numbed the hate I felt for myself with the boy I love today.
That was my worst mistake, and everyday I wish I could have turned around and walked away when he walked up to me.
But as my feelings for boys increased and my feelings for girls disappeared I started to realize something. I realized that my physical form wasn't me. My body parts didn't suit who I was inside.
But the boy I loved says he wouldn't want to be with who I wanted to be.
So I put a gun to her head, the real me, and shot her. I shot her so I could be with the boy I loved. A killed a piece, a major piece, of myself for him.
It stayed buried for a long time, but she's back. Shes back with her claws extended and ready to bite. All I can do is run, and hope she doesn't reach me. I couldn't let the real me take over,
- from the boy that never felt right.

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