Why Me Lawd!!!

“You’ll be summoned in five minutes,

This had been said by one of the many producers that I had been speaking to all morning. She had stuck her head inside the small waiting room that I was sitting inside, and she revealed this message to me, then she closed the door and vanished somewhere down the hall.

That producer was a short, young woman of twenty with shoulder length, starch blonde hair that hung stiff from her scalp. She was wearing a black skirt that stretched to her knees and a long sleeve, light red shirt that had buttons lining the center of her shirt. I think she had introduced herself to me as Tiffany or Stacey, but I wasn’t sure since I had encountered so many producers this morning that I was beginning to lose track.

I nervously twisted around in my chair, spinning the bracelet that I had on my wrist around in tiny circles. It was a habit I had created for myself, only performed whenever I was anxiously awaiting something. I tried to take my mind off the waiting, by studying the inside of the waiting room. It was a small room, the size of a walk in closet, that was painted a nature green color. The room had two small chairs inside of it, there was one that I was occupying, and it was sitting along side an identical one.

When I had first arrived at the studio with my boyfriend, the staff and producers spoke to me for a moment, and then separated me from my boyfriend, leading him one way and then bringing me to this small waiting room. I had learned that I wasn’t allowed outside of the room because on several occasions when I had opened the door to set foot outside of the room, a producer would quickly approach me and scold me for walking outside the room. I was to tell them what I needed, at one time it had been a glass of water, and then immediately head back into the room.

The only contact I had with them was when they opened the door to the room for a few seconds to give me a time frame of how long it would be until I was called out on stage. I had probably been sitting inside the room for a good forty-five minutes.

I shook my head, trying to figure out what secret it could be that my boyfriend of five years, Alexander, could want to reveal to me today. It had been only a month ago when he had told me that he had a secret that he had been keeping from me. Upon hearing this, I had been devastated, since I was under the impression that we had a pretty open and honest relationship. Alexander then told me that the only way he would reveal it to me was if I came on The Maury Show so that he could tell me the secret to a nation wide audience as a way to shame himself.

At first I protested, not feeling the slightest bit comfortable about having our business upon display for the entire world to see, but Alexander had firmly stated that he would not tell me the secret unless I came on the show with him. After nearly a week of thinking about it, I finally agreed and he called the show, scheduling us an appearance on it. I couldn’t believe how quickly the show had responded and confirmed our appearance.

The next thing I knew, we were on a plane to Stanford, Connecticut, and now, here I was, sitting in seclusion, waiting for the producers to summon me onto the stage. I leaned back in my chair, lightly bumping my head against the nature green wall. I was racking every memory in my mind, trying to figure out what Alexander’s secret could be.

Alexander and I had been friends since we were about eight years old, but we didn’t really start dating each other until high school. We were so close with one another that just the revelation that he had a secret that he was keeping from me was a shock. I couldn’t even comprehend it, since we were pretty open and honest with one another. I had evaluated every possible aspect that could be the subject of his secret, though none stood out in my mind.

I had been racking my mind for weeks trying to figure out what it could be, only to reach the uncertainty that was associated with the fear of the unknown. I loved him so much and was hoping that whatever his secret was, that it wouldn’t tear us apart from one another.

I was ripped from my thoughts when the door to the waiting room swung open and the starch blonde producer stuck her head in the through the ajar door. I was half expecting her to reveal another time frame for my appearance on stage, but instead, she swung the door wide open and I noticed she had microphone equipment in her ear and a clip board in her hands.

“Alright, they’re ready for you,”

I rose from my chair, surprised that the sweat from my body was actually strong enough to make my loose, blue, knee length dress stick to my body. I felt as though I had taken a dip in a swimming pool, however the perspiration my body was producing wasn’t visible upon the glance of anyone who looked at me.

I walked toward the door, where the producer was standing, and she pointed down a long corridor. I suddenly began to hear the cheering of a live studio audience a short distance away.

just follow the hallway straight, and make a right through the door,” said the producer.

“Um, okay.”

I moved slowly down the hallway, trying to prepare myself for what would be at the other end. The hallway that I was walking through was extremely long, with adjacent halls lining the sides leading off into other areas of the studio. The building was about a block long and the size of a maze. Even the ceiling was inclined higher than most roof tops were that were designed for buildings.

It was a one story building, however the roof was a staggering twenty feet from the surface of the floor. I felt like a small ant as I traveled down the hallway making my way past a few other producers who were standing in nearby hallways, preparing to guide me to the stage, if I wandered off the path.

As I neared the entrance I could hear a crowd of people, clapping, preparing to welcome me onto the stage. I moved nimbly through the hallway, trying not to stumble or appear awkward, since I was aware that I was going to be on national television. I literally felt my heart begin to shake, as though it were preparing me for something drastic, when I turned the corner, spotting the wide door that would lead me onto the stage.

I walked a tad bit quicker, and then courageously emerged through the door onto the stage. The first thing I saw was a large crowd of one hundred and fifty something people sitting in comfortable chairs staring at me. The second they caught sight of me the large studio audience began to applaud me, perhaps to create the impression that they were welcoming me to the show or that they thought I was brave to broadcast my problems on national television, but in reality, I knew that the real reason that they were clapping was to thank me for entertaining them with my drama.