As the next day rolled around I left the house and walked to that hillside. The sunrise was pretty, just not as nice as the sunset. I watched again as the colors emerged and I smiled at the fact that nobody was with me. When the sun was in the sky and in place I left that hillside and ran into my house again.
The school door opened as I shoved it, it was quite the old door and I often had trouble with it. I walked into the hallways and observed my surroundings of children, tall and small, large and little, walking and talking. As I trudged past them with my head down nobody talked to me, something that rarely happens but is good when it does. I came to my locker and opened it seeing the picture of the sunset greet me. I liked that sunset picture, it made me remember that after school I get to see it in person.
The first class of the day was ok, it was a special class only kids who need it are put into. Apparently I needed it. This class was for kids who had trouble speaking out, maybe another form of therapy, who knows? Not me. I'm not going to ask.
As the class progressed and the teachers explained the assignments I finally started listening when they said partners were going to be assigned. I hated the word partners and even more the part when you have to have a partner and talk to them. As my name "Emily" rolled off my teachers' tongue I made eye contact with the person she paired me with. The name was "Jason". I looked to him, he didn't seem to fit in this class, he was outgoing and rowdy but had some problem with his emotions changing occasionally. He stood up and sat next to me and I moved to the right to avoid any communication.
Jason was a tall, brunette, loud 17yr old, I was a shorter, quiet, blonde 16yr old and people like us didn't match.
I looked in his direction as the teacher explained the partner work wouldn't start until next class.
Jason was quite a looker and I didn't think this way of many people, even myself. The way his hair fell on his face and eyes were bored. I laughed to myself, that's not what I'm thinking about. He's a guy and it's not like girls don't get attracted to guys. I let the feeling pass for I hated myself so why would a guy like me? My nose is too big and I'm fat, I weigh too much, my eyes are boring and I complain too much. Those are just some of things I am insecure about but I live with them.
Jason on the other hand seemed happy as could be but it's not like I'd ever be able to talk to him about it let alone participate well in group work. I flinched when I felt a hand on my thigh and realized it belonged to him. I immediately felt insecure, and scared and I moved away but he looked into my eyes and said "it's okay". I wasn't sure if this was a dream or an experiment or just plain weird but I felt something I rarely ever feel.
Affection
