Secretly, I Love You Boyxboy (Oliver Sykes/Andy Biersack)

chapter 6: i will never forgive you

 sorry for th wait for updates guys. this chapter and the next may have some triggering meterial if you are easily triggered i ask you please not to read on unless your sure. i love you all and i would hate if anything would happen to you guys. <3

~pixxie~

 song: lost it all- black veil brides

Oli’s pov

To say I was shocked is an understatement. i couldn’t think or move it felt like I was paralyzed. The feeling soon went away and started to kiss back. Wait. Why is he even kissing me? He said he hated me. Even though he said he was sorry did he mean it? I am so confused. I pushed him away gently that way I didn’t hurt him.

“Why? Why now? After you pushed me away wouldn’t let me close to you or tell you how I felt?” I rushed out. I was hurt. I wanted this for so long but I’m afraid this is all a joke. He stepped closer to me and pulled me to him and hugged me.

“Oli, I am so fucking sorry I hurt you. I was just afraid of how you would take how I feel about you. I thought it would be best to push you away before you could hurt me.” He held me close and I buried my face in his neck, breathed deeply and smiled.

“Andy I would never hurt you I care about you too much.” I wrapped my arms around his waist. “If you would have let me talk to you the first day of tour you would have known that.” I pulled back a little and kissed him gently. He instantly kissed me back and I smiled. He pulled away and looked at me.

“Oli, would you ever consider giving me a chance and being my boyfriend?” he looked down at his hands and fiddled with his thumbs. Was he seriously asking me out? My eyes widen and I smile.

“Yes, I would love to be your boyfriend Andy.” His head shot up and he smiled hugely at me and I couldn’t help but smile back. He took my hand in his and lead me outside. He continued walking past all the buses and to the front gate of the venue. I looked at him.

“Uhm Andy?” he looked at me. “Where are we going?” he just smiled and pulled me through the gate.

“You’ll see.” Was all he said as he pulled me further away from the venue. After about 10 minutes of walking we arrived at a little park and I laughed to myself as he runs pulling me with him to the swings. He sits on one of the less rusty swings and i push him back and forth. We did that for a couple of hours till we both got tired and headed back to my bus. We stopped outside the door and he kissed me.

“Goodnight Oli.” he put his arms around me and hugged me tight. I smiled and kissed his cheak.

“Night Andy.” I watched as he walked over to his bus and climbed in. I smiled and got into my bus heading to the bunks and stripping to my boxers.

It’s been a week since Andy and I started to date and we only have a week left on tour. I don’t know what we are going to do once tour ends and I have to go back home.  I yawn and pull on a pair of clean skinny’s and a Misfits shirt and head outside. I groan as the sun gets in my face. I pull on my shades and walk around the venue. A couple of other bands have joined in like sleeping with sirens and of mice and men. I smiled and walked over to the bvb  bus but as u came around the side I saw something I would never forget.

Juliet’s pov

I knocked on the door to the bvb bus. I missed Andy and I regretted hurting him.  that’s why I came back. He opened the door and I saw his eyes widen.

“Andy please don’t shut the door. I want to apologize for hurting you.” He looked out at me and sighed as he stepped out of the bus. He shut the door behind him and stood in front of me.

“I love you Andy and I can’t imagine living my life without you. Please give me another chance.” I pleaded up at him. I could feel the tears start to fall as he looks at me his eyes growing softer.  I felt his arms surround me and I just broke down as he shh’d me and rocked me back and forth.

“Ok Juliet one more chance.” He sighed deeply and leaned down and kissed me on the lips.

Andy’s pov

What the fuck am I going to do. I leaned down and kissed her. I love Juliet but I also love oli. I would have to break up with him. but telling him could hurt him so bad.

“FUCK YOU ANDY!!! IT’S OVER” I heard Oliver scream and I pull back and look up just in time to see his tear soaked face and him turn and run. I wanted to run after him and hold him and beg for forgiveness but Juliet grabbed my arm and pulled me into the bus. I fell back onto the couch and covered my face with my hand and kept mumbling “what have I done.” Over and over again. I felt the tears pour down my face as Juliet rubbed my back.  That just made me cry more. How could I do that? I heard a loud bang and I looked up to see Ashley walk in with anger all over his face.

“What the fuck did you do biersack and why the fuck is she here?” he pointed beside me to where Juliet was. I started to shake and stood up.

“’Ash I didn’t mean to hurt him, please believe me. I …I just missed Juliet so much and I couldn’t stand to see her in tears.” I fell to my knees crying.

“You better fix this Andrew.” With that I saw his feet retreat and him leave the bus again.  I felt a hand on my back and I flinched and looked up at her.

“Juliet I’m sorry but no I take it back I can’t give you another chance I’m in love with someone else.” She glared down at me and slapped me hard. I knew I deserved it.

“You’re worthless Andrew.” She stormed out of the bus. I sat there on my knees for a good ten minutes before I could gather enough strength to stand up. I walked out of the bus and slowly made my way to bring me’s bus. I didn’t knock and I just walked in. at first there was nothing but silence then I heard the quiet sobbing from the bathroom. I walked over to the bathroom and knocked.

“Oliver please……please open the door” he didn’t answer for a while. I was about to knock again when he started talking.

“Go away Andy. You don’t care. No one does. But don’t worry no one will have to put up with me anymore after this.” I heard a glass bottle being set down on the ground and knew he was trying to drink the pain away. I knocked on the door again but this time I heard a thud in answer.

“Oli?........Oliver?” I started to really worry when he didn’t answer so I tried to open the door but as I thought it was locked “OLIVER OPEN THE FUCKING DOOR PLEASE!” when he didn’t answer this time I took a step back and kicked the door open. When I saw the sight before me I ran to him and fell to my knees and pulled him into my lap and started to rock and cry. I pulled out my phone and called Ashley.

“This better be fucking good biersack I’m still pissed at you” I sobbed loudly and pulled Oliver closer.

“Ashley I need you to get the rest of bring me quick oliver… “ I started to cry harder. “oliver c..cut his wrists…open ….i’m scared Ashley please."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

thank you guys for reading an ill update soon i promise. i love you <3