ZARA

and he ended up giving me the silent treatment. just as i thought, maybe he didn't wantmto start a fight i guess,

if that's so then it's better than those fights, luke would go maniac, mad, holy, he is the scariest person,

i felt my body shiver at the thought of those fights

flashback~

"luke calm down!!!" I yelled, scared for my life, another fight today, that got luke angry, mad,

"YOU ARE TELLING ME TO CALM DOWN?!" he screamed throwing the vase on the ground, seeing it shatter into uncountable pieces.

i flinched, i just flinched, not at his voice, but at the vase, honestly he was like that since i met him, he had his moments, and i had mine, no problem, except, my moments were calmer, ALOT, calmer.

i gave up trying to calm him down, i sighed, i will just wait till he stops,

i started making my way upstairs to our room closing the door as i enter but not locking it. i heard luke shouting my name over and over, then again something breaks.

the kitchen, i am not surprised, his priority while destroying the house is destroying the kitchen.

CRASH

CRASH, CRASH

CRASH

CRASH, CRASH, CRASH.

BANG.

did he punch the oven? maybe.

i have two choices.

A) go and stop him.

B) wait for him to stop.

A is out of the list, so i am gonna stick with B. i don't want to loose a bone, not now, not ever. not after i broke my thumb when i was 6.

but the kitchen, my favourite place,

every time he destroys it, he said, it's not that expensive and he has money, from where? i don't know, but i am sure it's his work money, i say i would pay, but he doesn't let me pay for anyhting.,

after some more minutes sounds of crashing stopped and i heard luke talk on the phone.

"yes, new furniture, i want it here by tomorrow got it you fucking asshole? I. Said. Tomorrow don't you get it?!"

wait why is he calling that person an asshole? that's disrespectful to talk to people who work hard like that.

i just shrugged, maybe he is just angry, i shouldnt pay much to it.

end flashback~

should i talk to him? would he go like a maniac if i do?

i stare at him not knowing what to do and say, he was just sitting down scrolling through his phone through whatever he was scrolling through.

"um luke?" i whispered, he huffed "so now you wanna listen?" he said rolling his eyes, and continuing to ignore me.

"luke!?" i asked raising my voice a bit now, "what?" he snapped at me while i stared at him with sad eyes.

"i am sorry" i looked down, he will probably ignore me again, but what's wrong in trying? they say mistakes are the proof that you are trying, and that probably doesn't make sense with the situation i am in buf i just wanted to be wise as they call it i think?

i was actually very surprised when he pulled me into a hug, this is the first time luke talks to me when he is angry, when he gave me the silent treatment he talks to me after a day.

"you know i don't like it when you disobey me" he mummered burying his head in my neck.

"i know, i am sorry" i whispered. "i--" luke was cut off by his phone ringing, he mjttered something under his breath answering it

i tried looking at the caller but he walked out of the room,

did he just leave his girlfriend just there hanging for a phonecall. that made me frown a bit. it is always one of those 'private' calls from his work place.

"babe! i really need to go! they need me at work! i will make it up to you i promise! love you!" he called and i found him wearing his shoes, he walked out not even saying bye, or even waiting for my answer.

i never thought of this, but does he really love me? because i see my friends' boyfriends bring them whatever they want, they have their boyfriends to brag abiut how much they love them and luke doesn't show me a bit of love besides hugs, kisses, sex, not even a simple gift besides chocolate and a gift on valentines day and my birthday

why the hell i never thought of this before, does he really love me? no, he does love me he just doesnt like to show his feelings, and he isn't good with romantic stuff.

i kept laying on the couch trying to convince myself that he loves me while a bit of tears were falling, but everytime i did try, flashbacks were coming of him being an unloving boyfriend to me.

you know i don't mind a bit of love once in a while, i don't need expensive shit, just him not being a controling freak.

maybe he really doesn't love me, maybe he is just using me because i am 'skinny' and 'hot'

i need to talk to him about this.

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see, drama is starting.

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⏰ Last updated: Feb 20, 2017 ⏰

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