Soulmate?

Soulmate? - 1

Friend. Best friend. Soulmate. I never thought before that I'd find someone who can be that three. She's my Tiffany Hwang. We are in the same girl group called Girls' Generation or SNSD and I'm the leader. This year our contract will end and we still don't know the future of our group. Ten years as the member of SNSD with her and 12 years as friend.

Fans assume that I and her shares romantic feeling based on how close we are. They said our eyes reflected how we love each other. But I'll tell you something: its bullshit. We didn't share romantic feeling nor shall I say that just me who have romantic toward her?

Every time I search about Taeny-Taeyeon and Tiffany-I'll end up hurt me. I always looked pitiful in our pictures and videos. I mean I looked so love toward her. However, the most hurtful thing is Tiffany-the one I love so much-isn't realize my feeling while everyone else realizes it since years ago.

In the dorm, there are just me, her, Sunny, and Hyoyeon. The other members live at their homes. Can you imagine how stressful yet happy at the same time when you live in the same place with your crush? I feel happy because I can see her 24/7, but stressful because I can't touch her more than a friend. I also saw her fell in love with man and got hurt by them, I hate to see her cry because it's hurt me too.

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SM already decided SNSD future, they'll disband us as group. We're crying, sad because we can't perform as one again. Tiffany can't stop cry even though we are already arrives in our dorm.

"Tae, sleep with me tonight, please." She asks with her hoarse voice and it's sexy.

"Okay." It's hard to refuse her, she's my weakness.

After changes our clothes and ready to sleep, I go to her room. As my body lie on her bed, her arms are immediately wrapping around my waist. I hug her back.

"What you're going to do after this, Fany?"

"I don't know, Tae."

"I want to keep singing." I state. "I think you can't stop now too, Fany. You looked happy when you sang. I love it when you sing. You know I'm your number one fans, right?"

"Thank you, Tae. You know how much I love you, right?"

"I know and I love you too, Fany." It's hurt me every time she says it because the definition of our "I love you" are different. We aren't in the same page. I love her more than just a friend, but she loves me as friend or family.

Yuri knew all this time, even before I realized it. She also knew Jessica's feeling toward me while I didn't realize it at all. One of the reasons why Jessica out from our group was me because she couldn't hold the hurt she got when she saw me with Tiffany. She knew I fell in love with Tiffany, but she mad because Tiffany didn't know it and I'm just so stupid not to tell her. It was complicated, I knew, but to be more complicated, I can tell you that Yuri was fell in love with Jessica. I think she still loves her until now. Sometimes, I saw her stalked Jessica's social media.

Jessica told her feeling to me, but my heart already stuck to Tiffany. So, I said no to her. Too much drama, yeah, I know, but it was the truth. I already love Tiffany since years ago. If you say I'm such a stupid woman who just hurting myself, well, I can say that I am a stupid woman.

I think it's better to be at her side even though I don't have her. However, I don't know how things going to be since our group will be disband.

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