Diary Of Alice

Brain Dump

*****************TRIGGER WARNING*****************

THIS IS A TRIGGER WARNING TO CRITICS EVERYWHERE. BRAIN DUMP CHAPTERS WILL NOT INCLUDE THE FOLLOWING:

PROPER GRAMMAR; THIS INCLUDES:

     -FULL WORDS

-WORDS SPELLED CORRECTLY

-CORRECT PUNCTUATION

AND MANY OTHER THINGS THAT WILL TRIGGER YOU

 Thanks for understanding if you are triggered by anything that I stated please don't leave hate for I warned you that this will be a mess :)

59 words already written and I haven't even gotten to the good stuff. 71!

So a lot of things has happened and I will list them and we will touch on each subject at some point in this chapter, brain dump, rant thingy.

. First things first Aaron cause that is the main struggle right now and I can't go another second without spilling my guts to a few friends/ strangers I have never met in my life. Aaron isn't the most attractive guy to most girls I promise you this my friends, but he is hella kyute to me and he is the most wonderful guy and has the greatest smile. It spreads from ear to ear and it normally doesn't come without him yelling at some point. For example we were walking in the hallway and I saw he wasn't smiling so I went up to him and said. "Why arn't you smiling be happy." he just looked at me and smirked " I said smile sir" then he yelled "AHHH" and then he started laughing, which sounded like angels singing. As we were walking he was still smiling I done my job. Anyway Aaron is now taller than me by 3/4 of an inch but idk 'bout his height. Jacket is enough to get me out of my slump. Just to give you a tiny bit of background info I have liked this boy for 4 years and i liked him the same way each day, but now I am to the point I like him so much that I just want to have him happy and if he likes my best friend i will do anything in my power to try to get them closer because I know itll make him smile. Most girls think I am crazy for that, but idc its the way i show I care about you. Moving on, i basically just spent the past 412 words talking about Aaron and I am going to spend at least two hundred more about him. As I told you he likes my best friend... lets call her kait. Since I know he likes her I know if I ever, for some reason had the guts , asked him out I know he would say no because he likes kait and not me. So i know the answer is no and i have no chance but my friends like to think that I have a chance with him. Even though everyone says he is a bad person. I knew him before middle school and I can say that he has changed, at least in the school area, a lot. but what people dont see is the side I do. I was scared once and He reassured me in the calmest way possible and he sat there and made sure I felt fine and then we said goodnight. He actually sat there and listened to me talk about guy problems and heard me yell and he is still my friend so yeah I would like to say I still see a part of him that i REALLY like. Every now and again i have gotten the courage to talk in the halls or he sometimes talks to me and I take the little things in consideration and i really like to say a few things that really relate and i dont have any sources for them Just what i have heard and I really Relate too. please no judge. 

"Its easy to say you will die for a person but its harder to say you will live for them" 

"Screw having long snapchat streaks & smirk faces or secret glances in the hallway; I dont want them to flirt with my friends to make me jealous or secretly act like they are talking to someone else so then i notice. I dont want games i dont want games. i dont even want fake. We dont need to talk on the phone every night and hang out everyday we dont need to show everyone that we love each other and we dont need to post tweets when we got mad so we can hint to another that we are secretly mad . I just want someone who is 100% i want someone who can go out with their friends while i am with mine and still be on each other mind I want someone who cant focus on their test because they are thinking how blessed they are to have me in their life I want someone that I could make so mad yet they still adore me I dont want perfect I dont need anything close I just need someone who loves  Someone who cant just leave & if for some reason they happen to, that down the road my name would still make their heart hurt" 

Okay thats it for today next chaptr MIGHT be about how i got asked out by a psycho.

-M or Em

888 words