Beyond Brown Eyes

"It can't be happening, can it? Why? And why me!?" These were the questions on Carter's mind as he slowly paced down the halls of Mountain View High. He couldn't focus. Couldn't think right. All that came to mind were these haunting questions followed by the constant thought of Liam. Is it possible that one might feel this way, even without a consent of wanting to? 

The bell rang and Carter slowly got ready for weights class. A dreaded class. 

"There you are! What took you so long?" Amber commented as the two of them walked towards the weight room. Amber was one of Carter's closest friends. Their friendship had grown increasingly throughout the summer. Prior, they rarely remained on speaking terms. 

"Hey, sorry I just..." Carter couldn't think of anything to say. He stuttered for a moment and then drifted off becoming more and more confused.

Weights. Most teenage guys would just love this class leaping for that chance to pump the iron and get ripped to impress the small handful of girls residing. Most guys. Not Carter. Instead, Carter didn't know what he wanted now. Everything seemed to be going against his wants. Sure, he wanted to be strong and attractive, however Carter appeared different than the "normal kid." 

As Carter walked through the threshold into the small and limited weight room, Liam was stationed at the bench. "Oh great," Carter muttered trying to brush off his previous thoughts. He walked over to one machine and began his workout. 

Later that night Carter had difficulties sleeping. So many questions and he just wanted one answered. Why. Liam had been so nice to him, at least compared to the others. Carter considered himself to have several wonderful friends. Liam wasn't exactly in that circle, but they had started talking and hanging out more throughout the past year. And then all of this had to happen. It seemed so rude, to let this happen after all that Liam had done for Carter. All of this circled around one question.

Was Carter gay? 

"No!" Carter almost screamed before realizing it was now one o'clock in the morning and his family would be asleep. "I am not gay." He whispered as he stared back into the darkly reflecting mirror above the bathroom vanity. It was settled. He refused to believe that there was any way he was gay. Surely this was all a part of the normal stages of puberty. 

The tears began to stream down his face as he slowly climbed into bed. School was tomorrow. The plan was settled. He wasn't gay and he wasn't going to choose that lifestyle. Everything would be normal again soon...

Chapter One

Eight Months Later 

Life has it's twists. It's ups and it downs. Life simply could not be predicted. Anything could happen. One second you might be living a completely perfect life. Having everything you could possibly want or need. Comfortable. The next second you could end up in the hospital for a severe car wreck. We don't realize how fragile our lives are until we lose someone we love or we, ourselves, end up damaged. 

Carter pulled into the school parking lot set out to have a good day. Things had finally begun to take a spin and life was better for Carter. He had thought about being gay again a few times throughout the year, but always brushed it off. 

Things with Liam were improving. They had begun to talk more and hang out. Carter appeared to be happy for once in his life. Everything was finally progressing towards the much-fathomed happy ending.