Nightfall

Chapter 21: Loyalties

It felt like we watched the doctors work on the injured girls for years before Anya finally arrived. Since she couldn't fly or speed up in any way, the trek for her was much longer and more strenuous than ours. But she didn't say anything about it. After all, we had left her behind for a reason.

She stood and watched quietly with us for a few minute before finally herding us into the school. Reluctantly, we walked to receptionist and handed her our sapling, but we also told her to set aside the other one for the girls. It wouldn't do much for them because they would still come in last, but it felt wrong not to help them out a little. From there we made our way to our dorm and sat quietly in our bedroom, not wanting to talk, but not wanting to split up either. By that time it was only noon, but it felt like the sun could set at any moment. Although, that could have just been me wanting to end the horrible day.

Eventually we got up and walked the halls quietly, only passing a few people that all looked much stronger than us. The white marble floors were beautiful against the wooden walls and domed, stone roof. The windows that let us see the courtyard let natural light stream in, and it reflected off of the floor, making magical patterns appear on or dorm room doors. The place had a regal, elegant feel, and it paired as well with happy, joyful moods, as with our mood. I didn't intend to so intensely admire the architecture that day, but there's only so much to think about when you don't want to think about the only thing on your mind.

We wandered the sublevels and sat in the central courtyard for a while before ending up at the bar in the leisure hall, drinking vodka in silence. The bartender noticed this and made an offhand comment to catch my attention, obviously wanting me to open up. I didn't really want to talk, but somehow he coaxed me out of my shell with a combination of booze and smart words.

When he finally asked me what had happened to make us three like that he got a long, split story of our cavern encounter. To my surprise, he simply nodded solemnly and didn't bat an eye through the whole thing, giving away his familiarity with gruesome stories.

After we finished he put down the cup he was cleaning and leaned on the bar. He said, "You know, I can tell when I meet people who haven't been in this world long, because you still react to the darkness of it. In fact, I'm guessing you haven't really ever been stuck outside the defensive perimeter. This isn't heaven, we still aren't going to live forever. This place is pretty much controlled by hell. This is just the middle where you have a chance to live the way you always wanted and be what you always wanted. It's a second chance to see if you just screwed up in your first life or to find out that you really are just worthless. It sounds like those girls had something to prove, so it was a good call to let them decide for themselves. This might have been a hard way to learn, but the alternative would have had the same result. So, in my mind, you did all that you could do, let it go, we're all going to be dead someday, so enjoy your second life."

I nodded and tried to accept his words, but his impartial attitude about death kept me from it. I could tell he had been here awhile and knew what he was saying, but I wasn't ready to accept that death didn't matter. Maybe it was my youth speaking, but I wanted to see everyone live. I knew in my heart that that wasn't how it worked, but I couldn't allow myself to stop hoping for that. Because I knew the second that I did, the second that that hope died, I would die along with it in one way or another.

But his words made my heart waver.

"Don't worry about it, they weak ones and the stupid ones always die first."

Anya Snapped around to find Eva standing behind us in the relatively empty hall. "What did you say you little witch?!" she hissed violently.