Man of War

Father of Mine

I watched through the window as the sergeant told Tomi what happened to her father. First she stared in disbelief then her face looked sort of stunned, almost shocked. Everyone was silent as we waited to be taken back to our homes. Blake and Carson lived in the same area in California. Calvin lived in Texas, and Preston lived in Utah. I lived in California too but in a different city than Blake and Carson. I live in Auburn, the coldest place I could think of that's still close to home. My family lives in Sac, a short drive from Auburn. I think Tomi would like living there. It's a nice quite place. I don't know her at all and I've already seen her naked. Isn't that strange? Not to me.

I was surprised when I didn't see Tomi cry when she was told the news about her father. All of the women in my life would have ripped their own eyes out from grief. They are so dramatic, but maybe they could get a pass if they found that their father that they had been searching for and even went so far as to join the army just to find was found dead in the hospital. They would be crushed. So why hasn't she cried? Is she cold? Does she feel relieved that her father is dead? Does she feel closure? What's wrong with her? I know that when I found out that my father died I cried my heart out. That was 3 years ago. I was 17.

I carried 3 bags to the plane. One was mine, one was Tomi's and one was Thomas's bag. Inside of his was a note, and a box that contained some kind of necklace for Tomi. I am instructed in the note to give it to her after her father's funeral. She sat in the plane, her face away from mine as she stared out of the window. Her dark blond hair was in a loose pony tail and her grey eyes were visible in the reflection of the glass window. She didn't look sad, she just looked....neutral, idle, spaced out from the rest of the world. I put our bags up in the cargo compartment in the plane and then sat down next to her. She didn't turn and since, she just sat, staring. I stared at her beautiful hair and her perfectly shaped face. She was so beautiful. My mind suddenly forced my hands to slowly stroke her hair once. She turned around almost immediately and stared at me with a questioning glare. Her grey eyes for the first time burned into mine.

"Is there something wrong with my hair?" She asked with a funny smile. Her smile was so perfect and seemed like it sparkled almost.

"N-No!!!! I mean....it's just that.....you....your hair is nice.....it's soft...." I stumbled through my words. I totally lost my cool, I mean, usually I'm really smooth when speaking to beautiful women, but she is like a girl. Unlike any girl I've ever seen.

"Thankyou...." She blushed and smiled at me. I felt like I was in fire. I knew that I was blushing like a tomato, but at that moment, all I could see we're those grey eyes. They pierced through me, like they saw through my act and brought out the worst. I can't believe that I ever hated this girl. She's so beautiful....

"So....why are you staring at me?" She asked lightly.

I was yanked out of my trance suddenly and reality set in.

"What.....nothing..... it's just that....last night...you...I was....I'm sorry..." I muttered trying to appear less interested in her and more worried.

"Oh....it's fine really...." she blushed, her grey gaze turning from mine at the recollection of my hungry eyes devouring her naked body.

"No it's not....I just stood there while my friends were about to....." I trailed off as my eyes drifted from her red face to my hands.

"Rape me....yeah....it's okay Andy...I'm use to it." She said coldly as she stared at the back of the seat infront of her.

"What do you mean?" I asked trying to catch her gaze again.

"I've been raped before...atleast twice....I guess men in war really have needs...." she said quietly with the roll of her eyes. I felt speechless and angry. How could she be so cool about it. If I knew who she was I would have ripped those men apart. I would have killed them. I've killed before...but not for anything specific, just to cover my own ass and to protect my team mates. But I think now that I would kill for her.

"Well....you're very brave about it...I can't imagine how degrading it must have been." I said quietly, and becoming more comfortable in her presence.

"No...it just hurt alot the first time, because I was a virgin....but the second time was just me fighting and mild pain...it still happened though..." she said almost embarrassed. "I think the thing that hurt the most is that fact that I couldn't fight hard enough to stop them."

"I don't think that matters. I think you fought, and you tried like hell, and that's all that really matters." I tried to ease her pain and make her less embarrassed.

"I guess you're right....but I fought hard and still I got raped...I fought hard and still everyone found out that I was a girl...I fought hard...and my dad...he's....he's dead.." She said....holding back the flood that threatened to break from her eyes.

"You haven't cried. You can cry on me...I don't mind..." I reassured her as I placed my hand lightly on her thigh.

"I can't cry...I knew it all along...I can't feel....I can't feel anything..." she whispered, and I could tell that her heart was beating so fast at my touch.

I removed my hand quickly...and her breathing slowed to a natural pace. The flight went on for the next serveral hours, and she slept, not waking once. She snored softly. Not loudly enough to wake someone, but softly enough to slightly be heard if you were close to her mouth, which I was. She looked sound, and peaceful as she slept. If it weren't for the snoring I would have thought she was dead. The plane landed the next day, and we made our descent to our new home, and our new life.

•••••••

"Nice place..." she said quietly as she walked quietly behind me. "It's alot different from Arizona."

"Yeah...I tried to get away from the warmth for awhile since my dad died." I explained as I lifted the heavy bags into the house. I showed her to her room which was white and had a large window that took up a whole wall to the left of the door. I set her bags on the bed and they sunk against the grey and green comforter.

"This is your room..." I said sitting on her bed and staring at her gorgeous face.

"It's perfect, thankyou so much. And if you ever want me to move out...please say so..." she pleaded with me, sitting next to me on the bed.

"That's not necessary, I'm sure you're an amazing room-mate." I said with a devilish smirk. I could tell that she was taken with it, and in the end that's what I wanted. I clenched my teeth and smiled with my mouth, not my teeth and stared at her, who was staring at the wall.

"My dad wrote about you. He wrote me everyday, and I wrote him. He talked alot about you. He said he felt like he finally had a son. I didn't feel like I had a brother though. Honestly, I felt like my father had a reason to stay in the army. But it was comforting to know that someone had his back." She said quietly, not once turning to me. I couldn't help but feel guilty because although I had his back, he still got captured and died. I couldn't believe it. I felt tears whell up in my eyes and I quickly attempted to push my feelings down. I looked at her, into those grey eyes as she turned to me, and she noticed my pain. She pulled me into her arms and squeezed me. My head was against her breasts which were soft and comforting. I at first resisted the comfort, but eventually I had to fall hostage to her. It seemed that being her hostage would be a common occurance in my life from then on.