Fuck Buddies (Ryden)

Chapter Nineteen

When Brendon got home, he curled up into a ball on his bed and sobbed. He knew he had lost the one boy he loved. A heartbroken mess, Brendon cried and cried and cried until no more tears would flow out.

Ryan Ross was the only boy in the world that mattered to him, and Brendon lost him like that.

The door suddenly opened, revealing Brendon's mom who had just gotten home.

"Brendon! What's wrong?" Mrs. Urie worriedly spoke, running over to her son. Brendon didn't even bother covering it up anymore. He was too upset to care about anything else.

Brendon tried to speak, but all he could get out was a few whimpers. His mom sat down next to him, rubbing small circles on his back and holding her son close. This was heartbreaking to any mother.

"Ryan, he-" he choked out, "he doesn't want anything to do with me anymore."

"Aw, honey," Brendon's mom kissed his forehead. She was witnessing his first heartbreak. "Are you sure it's not a misunderstanding?"

Brendon sighed, wiping tears from his face - a daily activity at this point. "No, he meant it. Mom, I-".

He stopped himself, emitting some more sobs. "I love him. So so much."

"You poor thing." She sighed, hugging her son. Brendon felt better with someone to comfort him, and he was always very close with his mom.

She accepted him when he came out as gay when he was fourteen. He was terrified his family wouldn't accept him - and many of them didn't. But his mom was always there. He was partly the reason his parents got divorced. His dad wanted to send him to one of those sick, disgusting conversion therapy camps, and his mom would never let that happen. She'd die before she let her son go through that trauma.

That's why Brendon always blamed himself for his parent's divorce and had abandonment issues. So many people just left him when he needed them the most -- even Ryan today. But his mom never did that.

"You and me are going to have a movie night with all the ice cream you can eat, baby."

"Mom, I'm not up for -" Brendon protested. "No, you don't get a say in this." She stood him up, wiping tears from his face.  "Oh, my poor child," she frowned at the state Brendon was in.

His mom led him into the kitchen, getting out a tub of chocolate ice cream. "Mom?" Brendon began. She turned around, "Yes?"

"Thank you." Brendon cracked a smile for the first time that day.

"It's what mothers do, Brendon."

It was hard, but Brendon could get through this. That didn't stop him from crying himself to sleep, though.

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Brendon dragged himself out of bed the next morning, putting on a pair of sweatpants and a t-shirt before going down to eat breakfast. He was a mess; he honestly should've stayed home, but he went to school anyway. Within that broken heart, there was a sliver of hope left inside him.

There was still a part of him that thought Ryan would show up at his doorstep, horse and carriage or roses and chocolates or something else extravagant, and beg for his forgiveness, to which Brendon would take him back and they'd live happily ever after. Nothing else would matter.