Trust, Love & Hurt --The Fosters--

17 < Not the same Callie >

* Callie's POV *

It's been a few days after my Birthday. I haven't spoken much. I really just want to rewind time and never lost my memory. I discovered that maybe Brandon and I were something more than just foster silblings. I had a memory where I kissed him and that was why I freaked when he came in. I fiddled with my fingers on my bed trying to decide if I should go down and eat breakfast with everybody or wait until they head to school then eat breakfast. I was afraid. There was a knock at my door and I looked towards the door where Brandon stood there.

" Hi." He said quietly. It was barely hearable but I heard it.

" Hi." I replied back and he came in a bit closer.

" You haven't been the Callie that we all knew since Wyatt left." I looked up at him and laughed.

" I don't think I have been the Callie that everybody knew since the accident that made me lose my memory." I replied back trying to hold in the tears. I looked down and heard him sigh.

" Why are you distancing you self away from everybody?" He asked softly and I looked up at him then looked down again. " Callie?" He asked after a few minutes.

" I kissed you." I yelled but not loud enough for anyone else to hear.

" You remember?" He looked shocked then he sat down next to me but I instantly moved away fast.

" I don't feel that way anymore Brandon. I don't love you like that." I whispered and he looked at me clearly hurt but I needed to tell him.

" You are afraid again. You are putting those walls up high again." He said in a caring voice.

" I have a right." I responed and he sighed loudly.

" You also have a right to admit to the real feeling you are feeling about me." He answered back and I looked up at him.

" Which I admitted to you, Brandon." I looked into his eyes. " I don't like you like that. Whatever happened before my accident, it doesn't matter no more. So, you just going to have to accept that."

" I don't believe you." He came closer and I started to shake.

" No. You have to believe me, Brandon." I pleaded to him. 

" You have to listen, Callie. You love me and I love you." He pleaded. He clearly won't move on.

" It's going to hurt more if you don't drop this feeling you think you have with me." I softly replied. " If you keep on thinking that I love you, it is going to tear you up."

" But, you love me! You just don't want to be found out or have a risk of losing a family who loves you." I looked at him. It was actually a law that foster children weren't allowed to date the kids who lived where you lived.

" Just go before I tell Moms that you are trying to hit on me." I stood up and he looked at me.

" Feelings can't be helped. You knew that when you kissed me. You and I risked everything to be together including risking Jude from not being adopted but you wanted to love me so you did. And the Callie that I knew would never let me go. She loved me. You aren't the Callie I know and I wish you would hurry the fuck up so my Callie would come back. I need her. Not this stupid girl standing in front of me." He walked out and slammed the door which brought up a memory.

I walked in from trying to find some food for me and Jude since our Foster family wouldn't feed us near enough as they feed themselves. I saw Jude who was only about 4 years old with one of the foster brothers who looked about 17 years old. I smelt the vodka from here. " Stupid kid. Why are you wearing my mother's dress?" I saw that Jude was wearing a oversized dress that was definaty their mother's dress since I seen her wear it to a party. I ran across as fast as my 8 year old legs could go before the boy hit my little brother. He decided to go for me instead so he did and Jude knew what he should do next which was run and hide and possibly get that damn dress off before the foster mother or anyone else saw him in it or even touching it. I could handle the punches and kicks that boy could do. It wasn't new to me. It was at first but I soon learnt that not all families are like Mummy and Daddy. Daddy? Scratch that, he was a jerk. He used to be nice but something clicked in him which made him try to hurt us. You are supposed to love your children. That was what I always thought. Mummy always did but Daddy stopped. And I always wanted to know why he wasn't the person we thought we knew. He was a scary person now and now Mummy is gone. Jude and I have no else except each other. I have promised Mummy that I will protect Jude and if it leads me on the ground with bruises and cuts on me then so let it be. As long as no one lays a finger on my baby brother. After a while, the boy stopped the smashed the emty vodka bottle on the ground which scared me but I didn't show it. He then slammed the door and left me bleeding with broken glass surrounding me. I had to clean this up before anyone sees it or even steps on it. I hope one day things will get better before things get too extreme. I can't always protect Jude. He will get hurt and I will have to learn to accept that now on with my life that my life will be shit and no one will ever be able to change that...

"Callie?" I opened my eyes and I noticed that I was on the ground, leaning on my bed with a moist face from crying. I looked up and saw a concerned look on Stef's face. " Baby." She cooed as she sat next to me and let me cry on her shoulders. I feel like I shouldn't be doing this but this was the only thing that was going to help me through this. I needed to be loved by Stef and let her take care of me instead of me always taking care of Jude. It's my turn to be taken care of. I need to let my walls down, just long enough to know that I can trust these people who claim to want me and to love me like their own.