I lo-I hate you (2Doc)

I don't wanna sound like a broken record

I sighed lightly as I pulled myself out of bed
I messed up my fucked up Blue hair and looked at myself in the mirror...what a fucking mess..
I shook my head and pulled on a shirt and some jeans...I tried to avoid looking at the fresh brusies

Murdoc Niccals is the definition of an alcoholic, he's either drunk off his ass or high, there's no in between, seeing him sober is just a dream at this point.
I always tried to avoid seeing him, everyone did, Noodle and Russ hated it just as much as I did
And when we were around him, well, it didn't fucking end well...whenever he tried to hurt anyone; I'd take it, either that or he'd just go for me directly...
None of us even remember if has been sober...like..ever...

I went to go brush my teeth before looking at my bedroom door..should I even leave my room..?
But what if something happens to noodle?
I shook my head again and sighed as I left my room...Murdoc was probably asleep...I should just take this time to be happy with the guys..just for a little while..
I walked down the stairs and saw noodle, I smiled softly as I looked at her in the main room watching something
"Hey Kid"
I said sitting next to her
"Hi toochi!"
She said smiling at me widely
"You okay?"
She nodded
"Russ still asleep?"
"Yeah, he didn't get much last night..."
I sigh
"He must have been worried...Murdoc was pretty bad yesterday.."
I sighed heavily and put my head in my hands
"It's okay toochi, don't worry, we're still here"
She said as she climbed onto me and hugged me
"Yeah...I know kid.."
I say softly, she was only young and she's had to see so much shit...she really doesn't deserve to be here...she should be out in the real world making her own music and traveling...
"How are your bruises?"
"Don't worry kid, I've had a lot worse, I mean, my eyes are gone"
I laughed weakly and sighed heavily after
She hugged me tighter
"It'll be okay D...it'll be okay..."
And that's when we heard a door slam..