Flowers

Kim~ Sweetheart

Chapter one

Kim~ Sweetheart

A/N okay so wattpad deleted my first really good chapter and I was almost finished and everything but they deleted it ! UGH anyways I hope you like it I'm going to try to write it as good! Enjoy! ~Britt

Do you ever have nightmares you cry about? Especially if they have happened to you in realitly? I cry every day about my fathers death. I was ten when he passed away. So young? correct.

My father had a good family, job, friends, a beautiful wife, what else could you want? I have one word what he wanted. Drugs.

He didn't have the money one day after he already got the drugs and a ten year old, was told by his father to shoot my dad in the head if no money was given. Guess what? My dad had no money to offer. Poor daddy got a bullet through his skull.

After that, My mother was and is still going through depression. The only fun she has know is sitting in fathers office while crying and chugging down vodka. My family is sad now. The dreary brick house I live in is not the same it was six years ago. See, I'm sixteen now and I may hide it in school but, I'm a depressed wreck even after those six years of my fathers passing away.

I remember when I was about seven, My dad would take me to this little place in the woods but it was a field of beautiful flowers. I still go there just to think or look at now, the dead flowers. That field was mine and my fathers place to go but, he's not here to share it with me now is he? All those flowers he used to pick are dead just like Lennon Dawson himself. Sometimes I wonder why he would risk his life for drugs.

My mom on the other hand is back and forth in the mental hospital for suicidal thoughts and actions. Once I was about twelve I guess, I went into the bathroom and in her hand was a razor blade cutting across her skin. I called 911 and they came for her then put her into the mental hospital. Right now she's getting out of the hospital and everyone knows she is just craving her Vodka. Then here I am trying to stay strong. Yes I have self harmed but I realized it did nothing but hurt me even more then I was. I have scars on both wrists that I wish were not there.

"Stop thinking so much it hurts your brain cells." my mother would always say since i'm a thinker than a talker. If only she knew how much I was thinking right now in Social Studies class spilling out my story to you. Of only I could be with her and my father. We would be the happiest family. Then I remind myself, It's never going to happen he's as dead as a door nail Kim.

"Class tomorrow we are having a warm up quiz so be prepared. Have a great rest of the day." Mrs. Diane's onion breath wizzes around my nose making me want to gag. Only at Bulls Worth High School. My school is different to me. See, We have to wear uniforms and it's very strict around here. I sit by 'Queen Bitch' Or Lori the captin of the Cheerleading quad. She ignores me until it comes to cheating on the big unit tests that comes around almost every month. Lori isn't like the 'StereoType' popular cheerleaders. Sure she has blonde hair and a tan but she's not rude to me like the normal ones would be. I am the loner.

Since I only have one friend in the whole school it's hard for me. I'm fine with it it's just, Sometimes Lila can leave me out. Who am I kidding, She always leaves me out. Me and Lila have been friends since we were babies. After my dad died she kind of drifted. She's a cheerleader and could get any guy she wanted while I was holding her back from that. Lila has blonde hair that roams a little bit past her shoulders, tan skin, green eyes, a super model body. The better body you have the more boys you get here in California.

Ha, me on the other hand, I'm about 5'1, skinny, brown hair that reaches my lower back and that's always wavy while the style is straight hair here in Bulls Worth, My normal wear is NOT dresses and high heels, I like my skinny jeans and converse. My eyes are just a shade of light blue. While all these girls are wearing makeup, I only wear chapstick and I don't even think that counts as Makeup. I'm just that regular shy, loner girl in your class.