I wish they would've reminded you everyday and every second of the wildness and catastrophe you are. I wish they made you aware of the intimidating yet beautiful rhythm you moved along. I wish they would've made you understand that you were never meant for the quiet and calmness. You were made for the bold, the fearless souls, the threatening energy. You were made for the one who can acknowledge and understand the ravishing holocaust that is within you, and still admire you for it with the depths of the soul.
I wish they would've told you all of that. I really, really do.
Because if they did, you wouldn't be running away, dreading what the future holds for our dauntless bodies. If they did, you would hear the sweet jingles in my voice even when I voiced 'I hate you's with them. Freaking hell, maybe that's why they called our love "so wrong and immature". Our love was never the calming, soothing, placid emotions that others imagined love to be. It wasn't the unruffled spot in the sea of stressful voices and worldly pains. It wasn't a comfort zone, or some fire that kept you warm when the world is cold. Hell, our love was a contradiction. It was dangerous and fatal. It was a zone that pushed you to do reckless deeds, a fire that could burn your heart to ashes. It was a wild storm, wrecking us more than we already were. It was a ruthless wind, blowing in all directions, shaking us to our core. It was an untamed animal gnawing at our hearts and shredding it apart until we bled pain and tears. Our love was merciless. And now I realize why they said that our love was 'Wrong' ; because it was nothing like theirs. No, our love wasn't the heaven you hoped for, the peace you always thought that would clear the chaos within you. It wasn't 'normal' like what you wanted. Our love was a hell where the broken pieces of our hearts made a music much more beautiful than any instrument.
Maybe you are running away from me and this void of happiness 'cause you still hope that some silent emotion can tame the reckless being you are, so you can mix with the crowd. But I assure you, once you realize that no form of silence or peace can calm and love the chaos within your soul better than our love did, you will run back to this hell of ours. The screams of your own voices will give you silence and peace. The tears you choke will help you breathe. 'Cause darling the mess you are is meant to be burn and live, its meant to be embraces. It's meant to me loved, my wild cadence, not fixed or soothed. You'll know it soon.
YOU ARE READING
The Contradiction
Non-FictionA place where all the darkness brings you light. A place where all the loneliness gives you a sense of belonging. A place where death talks to bring you life. A place where you walk alone with everyone walking the same way. A place of contradiction...
