Monster |Torm

"I'll be away for a very long time,I promise..."

Seven days

It's been seven fucking days of guilt.

Of pain.

Of anxiety.

Of lost.

Of heart break.

When I herd they found Tord,dead, I thought it was a joke.

No.

Apparently he disarmed the umbrella he had and use one of the sharp bars to slice his wrists. When that didn't work,he stabbed himself.
45 times to be exact.

How?

Why?

I'm the answer.

He thought he was my problem. He thought I hated him. He thought I did love him.
Just got some damn pills did I get angry at him! I didn't even try to consider they where to help me!

It's my fault he felt that way!

I'm so stupid!

I punched the wall,over and over.

I groaned,looking at the pale wall.

I had balls for fists and tears streaming down my eyes.

What had I done you asked?

I just lead my childhood crush to suicide. All because I couldn't show him the proper love.

All because of my irrational thinking.

All because of my stupid,drunk,anxious,arrogate, depressed self.

I walked to the bathroom,my fist bruised from me punching the wall.

I opened my sink's drawer,my eyes slightly widening at the blade that laid there,mocking me.

I picked it up,throwing it to the side.

I need a bigger one.

I shuffled to the kitchen,my eyes gazing apon the kitchen knifes.

I grasped onto the first one I could get without stumbling. I took it in a firm grasp and raised it right above my wrists.

"I'll be away for a very long time,I promise..." I whispered,slicing my skin,my vision going black by the second.