Demons

Chapter Eight

The moment that he had pushed Brian out of his house and slammed the door in his face, Zacky sprinted up to his bedroom, tears spilling from his deep green eyes before he’d even reached the top of the stairs. He bolted into his bedroom and threw himself onto his bed, burying his face into his pillow and crying his eyes out.

He didn’t want to have to do this to himself, and especially not to Brian. He… He loved Brian, he always had, but it was becoming harder to fight his feelings now. He knew that he was single-handedly destroying their friendship and the close bond that they shared, and it was starting to destroy him but, what could he do?

He could distance himself from Brian, and suffer the pain of losing him that way, or he could wait until Brian kills him.

Brian could do it. He says now that he couldn’t and he wouldn’t, well Zacky knows this at least. While Brian’s in his human form he wouldn’t ever do anything to harm Zack. But if Brian was for some reason around Zacky in his werewolf form, or if Zacky caught him at the wrong moment, then there was little doubt that Brian would hesitate about snapping Zacky’s neck in two.

This was why Zacky was doing this. It was a selfish act and he knew this but, he didn’t want to get killed, let alone by his best friend. He knew that Brian wouldn’t give up on trying to get close to him, he was stubborn like that. However, Zacky felt as if he didn’t have a choice. He didn’t want to end up hurting Brian, either; he was scared that if things went too far then he’d lose himself again, that he’d attack Brian and he wouldn’t stop like he had last time.

He didn’t want to do that. When he’d ‘attacked’ Brian, he’d cried for hours afterwards at the countless things that could possibly happen. But that had been nowhere near as bad as how bad things would be if he actually killed Brian.

Zacky curled up into the foetal position and sobbed quietly into his arms, hating this. He didn’t know how long he’d be able to live without Brian, he needed him. Badly. Whenever something bad happened, Brian would be there for him, no matter what. They’d talk for hours and then, when Zacky had to go home, they’d stand up, hug, and Zacky would feel completely better. Brian was the only person Zacky knew that made him feel so happy, and this was why the separation was gonna hurt.

He didn’t know how this was going to affect Brian, at all. Brian had never been the emotional type; he’d always just remain composed in whatever situation. Zacky never got to see the real Brian. He had a feeling that Brian was hiding something else from him, something big. Something that had always been there, but had changed over time. He just didn’t know what the fuck it was.

If this hadn’t have happened, then Zacky would have confessed his love for Brian by now. If none of this had happened, if Zacky had never become a vampire and Brian a werewolf, then perhaps Zacky would be a lot happier. Maybe if he’d let his secret out a lot earlier then he’d be happy. He knew that Brian wouldn’t give a shit about the fact that Zacky was gay. He didn’t know exactly how he knew, but he did. Brian had once said to Zacky, ‘You’re still my friend. No matter how much of a mess you turn out to be.’ This was said about two years prior to today, but Zacky could never recall the reason why it had been said. However, it more apparent now than it had ever been. Did those words still apply? Was Zacky still Brian’s friend despite the fact that he was a vampire and at one point tried to kill him? He doubted this, and he doubted it a lot.

Zacky sniffled and closed his eyes, the flow of tears somewhat slowed by his eyelids. He continued to sob, though, as he felt the pain spreading through his whole body and engulfing him in anguish. It was an impossible decision that he had to make. He could either choose his own life… Or what he really, really wanted.

He wanted Brian, and he wanted him more than anything.