rain showers | c.yj

22

  Youngjae woke up from his slumber, unable to ignore the shaking of bed and noises of movement.

  He could hear the sweet humming of birds outside, and the loud yet distant noises of the city life beyond the white ward.

  Complaining slightly of the disruption of his rest, he mumbled some words in a tired voice before realising where he was.

  Snapping his head up, he came face to face with Yuri, staring into full brown eyes containing a sense of fear.

  "Yuri!" Youngjae gasped with relief, his body language relaxing at the sight of the awoken girl.

  He was so thankful to see her awake and well, he had so much to say to her. Everything that was on his mind before was coming back.

  But no reassurance came from the girl. No happy ending of 'I am okay, don't worry'.

  Instead, only tears answered his questioning mind. Her body trembeled, eyes watering with guilt and fear.

  A splutter of words came from her mouth, all inaudible to the boy but he could sense that there was something wrong.

  "Yuri? Slow down, what's wrong?" Youngjae asked with concern, resting a hand on her hand.

  He could hear the loud gulp from the girl and winced, awaiting what ever was to come.

  "I-I'm sorry."

  And all of a sudden, the ward becane like a cave, and the isolation and cruelity of the place hit him.

  Youngjae, of course, understood what had or was happening. Yuri had told her before but it just never really occured to him.

  Even now he was struggling to accept the fact that she had erased him completely.

  "We're not too sure why but it could be because you were with her before it happened and so..." the doctor continued to ramble on, her voice like a drone and becoming more a nuisance than anynthing.

  Youngjae wasn't even listening anymore, instead staring down at the floor, hating the coldness in it.

  "Sir, are you okay?" The doctor looked at him with concern, ceasing her long explanations.

  Nodding numbly, he waved it off and she continued to explain further.

  "Will she ever remember?" Youngjae intterupted.

  The doctor paused, regarding him with a look of sympathy and pity, "Maybe with time, although I doubt it if it is quite a triggering memory. Just don't force her to remember."

  Youngjae nodded, a glum look still on his face with waves if sadness rolling off him.

  The doctor gave her condolences, bowed, and walked away, leaving the boy to his own thoughts.

  It was just all so hard to take in, especially since he was going to finally tell her. Today he was going to make it all right but now, it turned out to be the complete opposite. 

  "Choi Youngjae?" A voice called out with a formal tone.

  Glancing around, he looked for the owner of the voice before noticing a nurse, heading towards him.

  "You can see Yuri now, she was requesting for someone and I think it was you."

  Gulping with nervousness, Youngjae thanked the nurse before walking back to the dreaded ward where she lay.

  His hands tremble, a wave of anxiety running through his body. He wasn't ready to face her, he wasn't ready to admit the truth.

  He stood at the doorway of the ward, carefully watching the girl (who hadn't noticed him) read through some of the cards beside her.

  He smiled at the gentle smile that laced her lips whilst reading them, sometimes a cute giggle escaped her mouth which made his heart melt.

  He lifted his hand to knock on the door but froze.

  Should he go in?

  He wanted nothing more than to talk to the girl but, Youngjae also wanted to protect the girl, to see her happy.

  Yet all that ever seemed to happen since meeting her, was her own sorrow and troubles.

  Youngjae had caused more grief than joy in his eyes, and he absolutely hated it.

  But maybe that was more of an excuse, maybe he was just trying to hide the fact that he was a coward.

  Too scared to start again, to face the truth and go through more hardships.

  Slowly, he stepped away silently, as if never there, only to leave the girl staring at the doorway confused, swearing she could've saw someone.

  Youngjae solemnly left the hospital, walking out it's grand entrance into the cold, harsh rain.

  He laughed bitterly. He hated the rain, but he always seemed to love it because of Yuri.

  Now, he struggled to see the happiness Yuri always discovered in it. The rain was raphsodic to him, intense in sorrow and despair.

  And so in the first time in ages, he cried.

  He cried and cried and cried, unable to control himself any longer, because he realised how stupid he had been, how unfair life was and realised that, he would probably never talk to Yuri again.

  Grimly, he looked up at the dark swelling rain clouds with a deep anger, fists clenching.

  He once thought that the rain was always a blessing, for he always got noticed by her in the rain, but looking at it now.

  Rain truly is a curse.

~~~

OkaY SO DONT KILL ME BUT I MISJUDGED. I said I had like 4 chapters to go but the next chapter is the final chapter  (which will probably also be shorter)

  Jheushej this book is hit 2k reads and im just so happy because I never imagined this to be read and it was like my first kpop fanfic???