So I'll sit here and let my world burn in front of me for as long as I need it to. Cause any slimmer of hope I have left has left my body.
I'm just a sad lonely miserable creepy Junior in high school who's real motivation now a days is the fantasy I escape from.
These last few weeks have put so much stress on my brain that I've gotten more headaches and now bloody noses! The worst part is that now I can't take medication to help or it will add to what could be the start of a tumor.
Oh btw probably have a tumor starting which isn't very fun just to let you know.
I've listened to depressing music and watched sad love stories and now talk to random people on Omegle to see if I could talk my problems out with strangers. So far it's been actually helpful and I can at least get some closure that someone cares about me.
I don't know about all of you though, I mean I used to be a king on this app. Posting new stories almost daily and enjoying talking about my new Sonic fan fiction or how I reached large goals i never would've thought I could reach. But I was pulled away from you, now I wear this Paper Crown with a castle that's fallen to the sea, knowing there's no one who will be a queen to comfort his king.
My world is shattered, my soul becomes darker and now I feel the rage about to release on to someone and I know that if that happens i will never be the same.
I'm not well, but that's my fault. I was the one who made her sad, I was the one that didn't notice her problems.
It was my fault.
Sure i could blame the guy she's with now for saying that he is manipulating her into thinking this (which he is if someone didn't have the IQ of mash potato) but ill blame myself.
So I'll sit and I'll wait when my future of my wife and my daughter sitting with me while we watch Gravity Falls changes to someone else.
Maybe in the future I'll let go, maybe I will stop going crazy over losing the best woman anyone could have, and maybe it'll be someone else.
But even if I move on my old love you'll always be in my heart. Hopefully it won't shatter more, cause you kept it together with me. I guess I need the strength to hold it myself now.
Thank you.
