For Now and Forever; Namjin Fanfiction

3

I opened my eyes. Jin had sat up, and was staring off into space. I sat up next to him.

"Morning Namjoon." He said, obviously in pain.

"Are you okay to walk?" I asked.

"Not really." He replied. I nodded, and stood up to give him some pain medicine. I cleaned up his face again, trying to keep everything from infection.

"Thank you." He said, "Why you would even come in after me, risking your life is something I don't really understand." 

"Of course I'd risk my life for you." I said. 

"We barely know each other."

"So?" I looked him dead in the eye.

"Namjoon, can I tell you something?" He asked, looking at me right back. I nodded.

"I have always felt... some sort of connection with you. We just met the other day, and yet it feels like I've known you my whole life. I'm not sure why though..." He stared off again. I paused for a moment. I remembered what I had felt last night.

"Me too, I guess. I don't really know how to explain it. It's almost like..." I stopped myself. I had already decided that it wasn't love.

"Were you going to say love?" Jin looked at me. I shook my head and continued cleaning his face. He smiled. "Is it because you're straight?" He brought his face close to mine, his lips dangerously close to mine. I stared at him directly in the eye. 

"Should I?" He looked at my lips, biting his own. I shrugged.

"If you want to." I said. He closed the space between him and I, attaching his lips to mine. I felt my heart rate pick up, and the want of more filled me. I entwined my hand in his hair, pulling him closer. He broke it, smirking.

"Hm, still straight?" He asked me. I shrugged again.

"I guess I'm not sure." 

*-*-*-*-*-*

The voices swirled around me again. I felt it becoming harder to breathe. I couldn't stop the tears from flowing out.

"Just give up."

"Don't even try."

"You're not worth it."

"You're meaningless."

"Just another pretty face."

"Die."

It finally got to the point where the voices were telling me to die. I saw an option. I could stay with Jin, or I could give up and get released from this misery. A table with pills and water appeared. I picked up the pill bottle, opening it. I looked into it, before emptying the contents into my mouth. I took the water and swallowed to pills. The table was pulled away from me, and my body fell into an abyss. I didn't stop falling. I kept falling forever and ever. Until...

"Namjoon!" I opened my eyes. Jin was overing over me, his face still battered, but looking much better. He wore a concerned face. I sat up and caressed his cheek with my thumb.

"I'm alright Jin." I said, looking at him. 

"I'm worried. You were like... whining and crying and it sounded like you were scared. What happened?" 

"I was just having another nightmare. It's normal." I said.

"I don't like it. I want you to stop suffering like that." He said, giving me a pouty face. I shrugged. 

"I'm used to it." I said.

"No. I'm gonna help you get better."

"No, let me get you better before you worry about me. I'm more worried about you." I said. He nodded.