Why Am I This Way?

About me

Hi! My name is Elizabeth and I'm hurting on the inside. But to be honest, who isn't these days. I am a generally happy person and I help others with their pain but forget about my own. I get to a certain point where I get depressed and I can't stop flipping between sad or angry. Only a couple people ask me what is wrong and I don't accept their help. I know, wanting some one to help you but rejecting someone's help because you don't think they are the right person. Most of the time I can't put my anger into words or I don't know what I'm sad about. How I deal with my pain is better than most, but still not the best. I shut down and drown everything and everyone out with my music and I cry. I'm an only child so it's very lonely in my house. My parents are great people and we talk a lot, but they don't get me do they? At least it seems like that right? Most of the things I'm upset about I've already told them, but that doesn't mean they still don't hurt. A huge problem I have is that I over think, which is the main cause for my emotions. If I'm not over thinking, I'm thinking about the future. Which is the scariest thing to me. If I'm not just thinking about the future, I'm overthinking about the future. All of that thinking makes me depressed. I try my best not to think, but big surprise! That fails. I'm happiest when I'm with my friends, reading, or listening to music. I want to be happy, but I think too much.