The Dolls Know All : Chapter 1

It was a wet spring day. I awoke feeling sick to my stomach, like a car had just run me over. I slowly got up and started getting ready for school. Great! Another school day, I thought miserably. I went down to the kitchen to make myself some toast. I was about to take a bite when I felt my throat getting overwhelmed. I ran to the bathroom with my hand on my mouth. That was the most disgusting experience I have ever had! "I thought you didn't drink yesterday," said Shannon, my best friend. Her curly black hair waved behind her as the wind passed through it. She kept her grey-blue eyes on the road as she drove towards school. "I didn't," I answered, "I haven't been feeling so good lately. Maybe it's the guilt eating me up from inside." "Or maybe you got some kind of stomach flu. But what guilt could you possibly have?" she asked. "Nothing," I immediately answered. She couldn't know. Nobody could. Yesterday had been Sam's back-to-school party. I had a blast but left early. Let's just say, I'm trying to avoid someone since I had a little too much fun this summer in Italy. *** We had boarded the plane as a family: me, my sister Karly, my mom and my dad. There had been a problem with the seats and I got to go sit in first class, alone. In first class, I found Steven sitting alone. I went beside him, "Hey there! What are you doing here?" I was so happy to see him. A flight from Montreal to Italy wasn't going to be fun all alone. He smiled when he saw me, "Hey. I'm going to Italy, obviously." "This is really awesome. Where are you staying?" I asked. We ended up passing all summer together. At the end of the summer, we made a pact: What happened in Italy stayed in Italy. What we forgot was: Unless it comes back to bite your ass. *** Shannon parked the car and we got out. Immediately, two guys started coming towards us. One was tall and had dreamy dark messed-up hair, wore glasses and held a bag on one shoulder: Sam. The second one, a little smaller than Sam, had blond curly hair: Steven. Shannon smiled and hugged them, "I missed you guys all summer!" "We saw each other yesterday, Shannon," said Sam. She crossed her arms, "Am I not allowed to miss you two?" "Of course you are!" Steven hugged her again. Steven broke free and said, "Khloe, hey, can I talk to you?" I hesitated for a moment and nodded. Shannon and Sam left to go inside. "What's up?" I asked, stressed. He didn't know what to say, "I uhh..." "Well? Spit it out!" "About this summer..." "What happened in Italy stays in Italy, Steven," I reminded, "Come on, let's go inside." He tried to follow me because I was walking extremely fast to not be at the same speed as him, in case he'd want to talk to me again. "Khloe?" I heard a really high pitched voice scream. I turned around and saw a short blondie holding a text book and smiling. I opened my arms for a hug, "Dorothy!" She dropped her text book and gave me a huge hug. Dorothy was a somewhat nerd. Okay, scratch that, she was a total nerd! She studied all the time but she was still one of our friends - one of the popular ones. Proof that being a nerd doesn't change your reputation! The day went on as any usual day, although I had a terrible headache - maybe from all the stress about everyone finding out about this summer. After school, Shannon and I stopped by the store and I bought so many chocolate bars and chips with coke. I was having some kind of craving for sweets. Shannon was surprised by everything I was buying because I usually just took a chocolate bar to not gain too much weight. Yes, I'm one of those incredibly annoying skinny girls that complains that she's fat. We jumped back into her car and went home. *** "Mom?" I called out from my bed. I could hear her taking her shower and I was starting to lose patience. I called out again. This time, she heard, "Yes, honey?" "I don't feel good!" I said. That's when I heard my dad scream out from downstairs, "Go to school!" Then there was silence. In my past school years, I've missed a lot of days because either I didn't feel like going; I was scared of presenting a project or some other reason. I started faking sicknesses in grade 6 because I was being bullied. Obviously, the bullying stopped when I got to high school. I sighed. Gosh was he annoying. I really didn't feel good, but I wasn't about to miss another day, I guess. I had to start the new school year with a boom. Same thing happened, we got to school, Steven tried telling me something about this summer and I avoided him. "Who do you like?" asked Shannon at the lunch table. Dorothy looked up at us from her note book, "Me?" "Both of you," said Shannon. Dorothy looked around the cafeteria and pointed at a jock, "That boy over there: Neil Pratt, so freaking hot!" We laughed. Shannon looked at me, picking at my salad, "How about you? Who do you like Khloe?" "I like..." I started. *** "Khloe!" Sam called out from behind. I turned around and saw him running towards me. I was walking home, last year, alone and he came to walk with me since he didn't live far from my house. He had a black hoodie and held a lighted cigarette in his hand. "Hey Sam," I smiled my dorky brace-face smile. Braces weren't that bad, but they were not accommodating at all. You know, the spitting and all! He took a drag from his cigarette, "What's new?" "Nothing," I watched his every move attentively. "I heard Shannon likes Steven?" "Where did you hear that from?" "A little birdie told me," he winked. "She doesn't." "That sucks. They'd make a cute couple." "I agree," I said. He looked at me as I had looked at him earlier, "Do you like me?" "What do you mean?" my heart was beating so fast. "I mean like like me." "Maybe," I teased. "Well, I do. Do you want to go out with me?" *** "Sam," I finished. The two girls had their mouths opened, stunned. "What?" I asked. They high-fived each other. "We finally got you to admit it!" cried out Shannon. "What?" I repeated. "We've known for like a year," said Shannon. "Are you serious?" I asked. They laughed. Shannon had a sneaky smile on. "What are you up to Shannon?" I asked. She shook her head, "Nothing, nothing at all." A few days went by and Sam and Steven started hanging with us all the time. I'm guessing Shannon and Dorothy got them to tag along. We were going down to the river to go dip our feet in. It was about seven p.m. and we had made ourselves a barbecue earlier. The guys were wearing shorts and the girls, short shorts, except for Dorothy. Dorothy was a very traditional girl. She didn't have any skirt that went over her knees, went to church every Sunday morning, prayed before going to sleep, studied all the time, never went partying with us, stuff like that. We took off our shoes and went into the water. We started splashing and everyone was soaked in the end. We all watched the sun go down in our underwear and bra. We had hung our clothes on a tree branch so that they would dry off. Steven asked Shannon to talk and Dorothy went back to dip her feet in the water. Sam came over to sit beside me. "Sunset's so beautiful," I told him quietly. The quiet right now was so serene. "I agree," he confirmed, "So, Steven's been talking a whole lot about you, as if he had a crush on you." I didn't know what to say so I just laughed lightly. He turned to me and stared me straight in the eyes, "I'm not going to embarrass myself again." "What do you mean?" I asked. He took a breath, "I mean, I'm not going to ask you out again to be turned down." "What makes you think I'd turn you down?" He looked surprised but then went back to smiling. He leaned in and our lips touched. He laid his hand on my waist and I put mine around his neck. We kissed a few times but then I pushed away, "Sam Fhonte, will you go out with me?" He laughed, "Yes. I've been waiting for this moment my whole life." "We're not getting married, we're just going out," I laughed along. He kissed me again and we watched the sun set. One week later, I was feeling even worst as the days passed by. That morning, I threw up on the side of my bed because I didn't have enough time to get to the bathroom. My mom told me to stay home and to go to the doctor's. She had to work all day and couldn't stay home. I called Shannon, "Hey. I'm not coming to school today. I threw up again and I have a head ache." "Can I help in any way?" she asked, worried. I thought, "Well, I need a ride to the doctor's." "Okay, I'll be there at twelve, I have tests in the morning and I can't come earlier, sorry. I could send Sam over, if you want," she said. "No, I'm really sick and I don't want him seeing me like this. And don't worry; I won't be dead by twelve. I've survived three weeks of school and headaches, back aches, throwing up and all those disgusting things, I can survive half a day." She laughed and I hung up. *** The doorbell rang even though it wasn't twelve yet. I got up from the couch and went to open the door. It was Steven. "Hey," he said, "Shannon told us you were sick and I wanted to check up on you." He had a shy smile on. "Thanks, but I'm okay," I reassured. He handed me a container, "I brought soup!" I laughed, "You're adorable! You want to come in?" He came in. I put the soup on the kitchen counter. "So what do you have exactly?" he wondered. We sat down on the couch, "I don't know. I'm going to the doctor's this afternoon, when Shannon comes," I explained. "Do you want me to bring you?" he proposed. "Don't you have class?" "Nope, I have one free hour." "I guess it would be better to go now." I got dressed and we went to the doctor's office. We walked into the doctor's office. I explained what was wrong and the doctor looked at us for a long time, figuring things out in his head. "Sit down on my examination table," the doctor ordered with his clearly-fake british accent. I went over and sat down on it. He listened to my heart beat and asked me to weigh myself. "Oh my gosh! I gained three pounds!" I blurted out. The doctor's face looked like he had solved a puzzle. "Do you mind if I look inside your belly with an ultrasound?" he asked. I was confused, "Why?" "I believe you may be pregnant. I mean, all the symptoms are there." Steven was still sitting on a chair in front of the doctor's desk and he looked horrified. Millions of thoughts passed through my head, "You must be mistaken. I can't be pregnant." "Have you had any unprotected sexual intercourse in the last few months?" he asked. *** I heard the front door close. I awoke and the first thing I saw was the beach. Italy was beautiful, especially when you rented a house on the beach. Waking up to the sound of the waves, having a cool breeze intrude through your window and fly over your neck, that was just perfect. I looked towards the door when I heard more noise and I noticed Steven, asleep beside me in bed. I kissed him and he moaned. "Good morning sleepy head," I whispered. He didn't even open his eyes, he kissed me first. "How are you doing, beautiful?" he asked, still half asleep. I smiled, "I'm great." Later, we went on the beach and we talked. We were in the water, soaking our legs and he looked at me tensely, "Yesterday night was amazing. I don't know about you, but that was one of my favorite moments in life. How did you feel?" I laughed, "To be honest, it hurt, in the beginning, but then it became one of my favorite moments too." He kissed me again and I jumped in his arms to kiss him back. We went back to the house. *** I looked at Steven, "Yes but we used protection." "Condoms work only 98% of the time," muttered Steven. I got up, "What? You expect me to believe that we were part of the 2 stupid percent that used a bad condom?" "It might have broken," continued Steven. "Might have? You're the one who puts on the condom! You should know!" I was starting to raise my voice. The doctor waved his hands around, "Let's all calm down, shall we? Ms. Adams, would you mind if I did an ultrasound?" "I guess not." An ultrasound is an amazing machine created by humans. It's crazy what someone can accomplish if you really put your mind to it. We could see a small weird ball on the screen. My eyes started blurring up with the tears and the tears were pouring down on my cheeks. Steven was holding my hand and saying, "It's going to be alright." The doctor was talking but I wasn't listening. I was too busy thinking of how my parents would react when I told them. Or maybe I shouldn't tell them. I didn't know what to do anymore. When we came out of there, I was petrified, in Steven's arms, holding a picture of the ultrasound. "One month. How could this have happened?" I asked myself out loud. "Do you think it was a mistake, everything that happened in Italy?" Steven asked. I shook my head, "No. We just should've been more careful every single time." "That time on the beach, we didn't use a condom, Khloe." We got into his car. "Yeah. That was probably the loop hole," I rubbed my stomach. He waited, "What do you want to do?" "What do you mean?" "Do you want to keep it?" "Steven, I'm sixteen! I'm not ready to have a baby!" "Then, you want to give it up for adoption?" he looked hurt, defenseless. I guess it's the news that had tormented his bad boy attitude. "No." "Then, what?" "Steven, I..." "Abortion? You want to have an abortion?" he asked. I slightly nodded and puffed up my cheeks, "It's our only choice." "Adoption is too. Getting an abortion is killing a baby." "I know what it is. But this baby isn't even alive yet, I won't be killing it. Listen, if you don't want to come, I'd understand. I can go alone." "You're not going to tell Shannon or Dorothy? Get their opinion?" he seemed surprised. "I don't know. I don't think so. What about Sam?" "Sam should know. He's your boyfriend," he said. I closed my eyes and lay back on the car seat. "I'll take an appointment with the doctor for this week, alright?" he said. I nodded. The few days before the abortion date were complete torture. I was throwing up a lot - as if the 'foetus' or whatever knew what I was going to do - and people were starting to ask questions, along with my parents and my friends. Food poisoning: that's what I told everyone the doctor thought I had. I felt so bad lying to everybody but I wasn't ready to tell anyone. Late at night, I'd cry myself to sleep. This whole situation was killing me. I couldn't take it. I couldn't wait for all of this to be over even though I had a bad feeling it wasn't ready to be over. I heard rocks lightly hit my window. I wiped my eyes and went over to look at who it was. I pushed my curtains and I saw Sam. His motorcycle was parked on the street and he had a handful of rocks in his hand. I opened my window, "What are you doing here? It's late." "We need to talk," he said, seriously. I pushed my hair behind my ear, "About what?" "Can you open the door, please?" he asked. "Okay." He threw the rocks onto the street and walked towards my front door. I closed my window and started stressing out. What if he knew? What if Steven had told him? I opened the front door silently and walked out onto the porch, "What's wrong?" "What happened this summer?" he asked. I opened my mouth but nothing came out. A tear glided across my cheek and fell into my mouth. It was salty. It reminded me of the salty waters in Italy. "Why?" I managed to say. "Answer the question, Khloe." I shook my head, "I went to Italy." "You know that's not what I'm talking about." "What do you want me to say?" "The truth would be good." "I was in Italy. You don't believe me?" "What happened in Italy?" "Nothing. Nothing special anyway." "I can't believe you would lie to me like this." "Why?" "Steven told me." "Sam, I -" "No! Why didn't you tell me?" "Because I... I don't feel the same way about him than how I feel about you, so it wasn't important to my eyes." "You had sex for the first time with my best friend. You didn't think this was important?" "No." "Do Shannon and Dorothy know at least?" "No." "Why did you keep it a secret? If it's not important, why were you hiding it?" "I don't know." "Of course you do." "What else did Steven tell you?" "I'll see you tomorrow at school," he walked down the porch stairs and got back on his motorcycle. I cried as he drove away. I sat down on a chair on the porch and cried myself to sleep. Did he know I was pregnant? Did he know I was getting rid of it? I had strong feelings for Sam but this was a baby. Maybe I would just block it out of my mind from now on. The next morning, Sam looked at me from afar as he got off his motorcycle. Steven was walking towards him, smiling, but then his smile disappeared. Sam started beating him up. Punch after punch. Steven was down but Sam kept punching him. People were starting to gather around as Shannon ran over to break up the fight, along with the crowd. I didn't move - I was frozen. All this was because of me. I had just broken a bond between two best friends. Sam got back on his motorcycle and sped away. Steven was still on the ground, bleeding in a several places. A few minutes later, an ambulance arrived. The ambulance parked beside me and took out a stretcher. When they were about to put the stretcher, with Steven on it, in the ambulance, he motioned that he wanted to talk to me. I went over. "Why the hell did you tell him?" asked Steven. One of his eyes was half shut. I shook my head, "I didn't, I swear, I didn't tell him!" "Well neither did I!" They loaded the stretcher into the ambulance. I got home and started freaking out a little bit. If someone else knew about my pregnancy, they could completely ruin my love life, my reputation and possibly my friendship with Shannon - who I was sure liked Steven. I went upstairs to get the ultrasound picture because I wanted it gone, burnt, whatever, I just didn't want it anymore! I wasn't going to have the baby anymore soon, so might as well get rid of everything else too. I had hidden it under a few books in my night table so I pulled on the drawer with all my strength and it came out of the night table and flew across the room. I took the two books that had been over the picture and threw them at my wall. I was mad and stressed: bad combination. It wasn't there. The picture wasn't there. Instead there was a little cardboard cut-out in a doll shape...

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