My sweaty hand grips the iron handle and I fling the door open. I keep my head down, not wanting anyone to notice me. I stared at the ground, and curved through the circles of friends chit-chatting, not bothering to move for me, to finally arrive at my locker. So far so good. I got my books ready for the day, and turned to walk into my homeroom. My gaze stays on the white and green laminate tile floors, and see three pairs of high heels. One pair was pink, the other was blue, and the final pair was purple. I’d bet they were the hottest new fashion and cost more money than I’d ever have. That only meant one thing.
Crap, I think.
“Hello,” that mocking voice sing-songed. It was the very voice I had learned to dread over the years.
I looked up into the eyes of the one and only Britany Hassler. Out of my peripheral vision I could see her accomplices, Avery and Brie.
Britany, Avery, and Brie were the main sources of the bullying I faced nearly every day of my life. From fifth grade to twelfth, they wouldn’t stop explaining to my just how awful I was. They had made my life into a living hell.
“Don’t even look at me. You don’t deserve it,” Britany sassed, averting my eyes.
Once again, my eyes fell to the floor, and more and more insults were pounded into my head. I was on the border of giving up and seeing just how much more I could handle.
“Gosh, just when we thought you couldn’t get any uglier,” snickered Brie.
“You are so worthless,” scoffed Avery.
“Wait, why are we even wasting our time with it?” Britany asked, not even acknowledging the fact that I was a person, not an it. “This thing is so low, I don’t know why we even notice it. I’d rather talk to a wall. But, one more thing. Just thought you should know, no one likes you. They’re all pretending. Who would like something as ugly, stupid, fat, trashy, and just purely awful as you? If I was you, I would’ve killed myself a long time ago.”
With that statement, she spun around on her heel, strolling over to her circle of friends, leaving me alone. Again.
I’d heard it all before, but each time still stung. I was almost numb to this kind of pain, but I couldn’t help it. Words hurt. The words that came out of their mouths also came out of my other peers, and it was absolutely awful.
As hard as I tried, I couldn’t help but let a tear escape my eyes. So much for numb. That one tear was followed by one more, but that was it. I’d trained myself to keep everything bottled up. I wouldn’t admit anything to anyone, because no one really cared. Stuffing it down is often the easiest thing to do.
I took another shaky breath and shuffled to homeroom. I sat in the back corner of the room, in the far left. I watched from the shadows as life went on without me. No one noticed that I wasn’t talking. No one would have cared about what I said if I did talk. No one recognized my existence. I’m just the strange extra in their movie of life. I’m that awkward girl, who was always in the back of the class. The one detached from society.
The bell rung, and I scurried as fast as my feet would possibly carry me to get to music. The only reason I was remotely eager to get to music is because it is the only place I really feel relatively comfortable in school. I took my seat in the far right corner of the room. I sit down, ready to learn more about the thing I love most.
“Hey,” I hear a voice deep say. I look up into the most beautiful blue eyes of someone I’d never met before. He flashed me a side smile, and I saw his white braces shining off his teeth. His blonde hair was stained with brown and swished up to the side on the top of his head. Why would he be talking to someone like me?
