OOPS. i completely forgot this existed?? yikes.
well. to be honest, the past three days have been completely shitty. first, we had a big state test which i guess i did okay on. i don't even wanna think about it really. and then next. my internet friend group and i, got in a huge fight.
it's exhausting really. so basically, lately it just hasn't been the same. we've barely been taking much anymore. we all got in this big argument about shit like "well if we barely even talk anymore what's the point of staying" but then we realized none of us wanted to leave and we actually did this really cute thing where we made an entire new group chat (on Instagram btw) and we all reintroduced ourselves and I was really sweet. after that i thought everything was okay and we could just all forget about it.
apparently i was wrong. so one of the girls, we'll call her lamp, decided later that night she just wanted to leave. just leave. so she did, and no one noticed. YES I KNOW THAT SOUNDS BAD!! but if you've ever been in a group chat on Instagram, it does not notify you when someone leaves + she had just added her second account to the group right before she apparently left. so i had no idea that she left + + she was reading what we were all saying through out the night. so our other friend, we'll call her couch, apparently knew that lamp left from the beginning and got mad at all of us that we didn't notice. she went off on us all and i woke up to it this morning and i just got so mad so fast and i went off, and i said a lot of things that weren't exactly true but, im not really sorry about it either. so long story short, both lamp and couch left the group today for good and i have no idea if they're coming back.
it sucks. it sucks knowing two people that you care so much about and love so much can leave your life so quickly. im also scared that another girl in our group (there is six of us total) won't be talking much anymore. we can call her table. i love table so much and she's actually been extremely distant for a while. it hurts, knowing that's shes going through a lot of shit right now and i can't even help her brushes doesn't want it. the past couple weeks I've been so scared that im gonna loose table and there's nothing i can do. it hurts so bad. i just wish i could hug her, just once.
that's all i have to say. sorry if that actually made no sense at all. my head isn't really all that clear right now. thanks for reading
much love ❤️
YOU ARE READING
rants, by yours truly
Randomit's not rants. im not changing the cover or title cause im way way too lazy for that. it's honestly trash?? but whatever lol -sorry for the cursing mom- *lowercase is intentional*
