Yes, i do want to get better, but its a bitch todo. I have tried to get better so many times.. And oh my god how many times i have failed at getting any better. The only thing that actually happened was, i got worse. And that is the truth. I have got better a little bit (havent cut in almost 3 months) but not much. I still have suicide on my mind very much. Every single day to be honest. It goes through my mind so much every day. But the sad thing is i dont tell anyone.. i keep it to myself because I'm a complete dumbass. My depression all started almost 3 years ago, because i started to realize what my "uncle" had been doing to me was completely wrong, and bad. It completly ruins your life. What he did was completely bad and I thought it was all my fault in the end of it because i didnt tell someone when i should have. It happened for 4/5 years, and i only spoke up last years. In 2016. The first person i told was my ex. I regret telling him because he makes fun of me now. I dont just regret telling him, i hate myself for telling him. I completely hate myself. My "uncle" he malested me if you didnt already guess what he did.. I just want to say a couple more things that i have said before in this story. If you are going through the same thing, or have gone through this type of stuff, you are not alone. You may feel like it but you arent. You are not alone in this fight/struggle. You may feel like its your fault, its not. The person that did the bad things is there fault. You should not feel like its your fault when its not. I have learnt from experience that it is not my fault. It really sucks, but you have to not think that way, think of that its not your fault. And i can promise you things do get better. I promise you that.
