Take My Hand

Seven

Published: January 23, 2017

"If you live in fear of the future because of what happened in your past, you'll end up loosing what you have in the present."
-Unknown

I'm shaken awake, and pulled from another terrible memory. This time when I wake up, it's early and Janet is sitting on the edge of the bed. I flinch away when I first see her but relax when I realize who it is.

"You ok?" She asks and I hesitate before I nod. My body hurts and I can't get my arms, legs, and back to relax.

"Hurts." I whisper and she nods.

"Think of something that makes you feel happy." She suggests. I think of the day in Carter's office when he was singing to the music. I can feel my legs and arms relax and it doesn't hurt anymore.

"Let's get you up and ready." Janet smiles and I look at her confused.

"You slept for almost two days. You've been slipping on and out of sleep, briefly answering some of our questions before falling back asleep. It was your body fighting off the bacteria and virus's you had from that place." She says. I don't know most of what she's talking about but I trust she knows what she is talking about. I just nod in response and slowly sit up.

"Let's get you ready to meet Alphonso." She says happily and rushes to the closet. She returns with the blue dress we got, some blue matching house flats and a hair tie.

"Go get in the shower." She says and I look at the bathroom door. I shake my head and back away.

"N-no." I stutter stumbling backwards. In reality, I'm in Carter's bedroom. But in my mind. I'm back in that moldy place with those.....things.

"Chloe?" She calls.

"Chloe." Janet's voice turns into that of the mans who commands the whip.

"N-no. Stop." I yell weakly and crawl backward away from the voice. I can't see anymore and my back burns.

"CARTER!!!" Janet yells. I've finally reached a point where two walls meet and I tuck myself deep into that corner. My legs hugged against my chest and my arms around them.

"What did you do." I hear Carter yell.

"I didn't do anything. I just told her to go take a shower." The mans voice replies. I flinch at the sound of it and press back more against the walls.

"What's going on?" I hear a deep rugged voice and tremble from the slight remembrance of it.

"You two. Get out." Carter's voice is harsh and mean but I know without any thought, that I can trust him. A door closes and I hear him humming.

"You're not alone.

I will stand by you.

I will help you through

When you've done all you can do.

And you can't cope....

I will dry your eyes

I will fight your fight.

I will hold you tight.

And I won't let.....

Go." He sings. His deep voice does things to me. I feel calm, and secure. It loosens my grip on my legs and my eyes slowly allow vision through again. I look up at Carter and he smiles at me and lifts me into his arms.

"It's ok Chloe." He whispers.

"T-they." He nods and kisses my forehead.

"I know." He carries me to the bathroom and sets me next to the tub.

"I'm sorry." I whisper when he starts the water.

"You have nothing to be sorry about. We all have our fears. They are what makes us who we are." He replies and turns to me.

"Lift you arms." He says and I do.

"I... I wanna try. By myself." I whisper.

"Just. Stay with me." I add and he nods. I slowly pull one arm in the shirt followed by the other and I pull it over my head. I push my shorts and underwear down and push off my socks.

Carter turns off the water and sits on the toilet. He pulls me to him before I can sit in the tub and he slowly pulls off the bandages.

"Ok. Go ahead." He says and gently pushes me forward. I step in and sit down. I look at the clear water and take the cup Carter hands me to wet my hair.

"Chloe." I look over at Carter and he smiles.

"Alphonso is here." He whispers.

"Does....does he know?" I ask and pour more water on my hair. He squeezes a nice amount of shampoo on my hair and leans back on the toilet.

I softly rub my hands in my hair for a while and plunge my hands in the water to get rid of the soap. I pour water on top of my head and close my eyes when water threatens to enter my eyes. I feel Carter assist in getting rid of the soap where I can't lift my arms and he washes my back while he's at it. He then walks out of the bathroom and returns before I can start to panic. He had my clothes and a fluffy towel.

"Clean your body then come on out." He says and looks around in some of the cabinets.

I quickly rub some soap on my arms, legs, torso, and neck, then use the cup to rinse off and I stand up. I step out of the tub and Carter is ready with a towel that he wraps around me. I gently pat my body down with it and take the underwear from Carter. I have to sit on the toilet to put them on without hurting my back but I manage all the same. Carter holds out a blue bra for me and I pull the straps over my arms to hang on my shoulders. Once comfortable I struggle to clip the back before Carter comes to my rescue and puts on bandages before doing it for me. He helps me with the dress and I slip into my flats. Carter gently brushes my hair then smiles at me when we are finished.

"You look beautiful." He whispers hugging me against his chest. I blush finally knowing the meaning after Janet told me.

"Thank you." I whisper and he smiles at me while grading my hand.

"You ready?" He asks.

"F-for what?" I ask.

"To meet Alphonso." He smiles. I give a small smile.

"I guess." I whisper a little nervous.

"Don't be nervous. He'll love you just like he always has." He smiles. He places his lips on my forehead and slowly pulls away.

"I'll be right next to you." He whispers. And that gives me all the strength I need to do this.

I Won't Let Go - Rascal Flatts