Your stupid name and your stupid face
All those things I loved and believe than will never be replaced.
It was all you.
If only you knew.
I didn't kiss you because I loved you.
I kissed you because I was craving a touch.
I was craving love. I was craving that feeling.
I kissed you because it was a game. And it was funny.
But that's not funny, and it not okay. Because it was dangerous, you are dangerous.
You're a ticking time bomb ready to go.
You're ready to go, I just don't want you to blow.
Things aren't okay, I am not okay.
I feel lost at time, I feel like I'm in constant darkness but at the same time being attacked by interrogation lights to the point that I am blind.
There is no feeling in what happened. It wasn't me. I was high.
Not the high that you get when you're on drugs, im not that type of person.
I was in the type of high that a person is on when they're in pain and not wanting to think just do. Even if I still hesitate. I wanted.
But I don't know what I wanted because I got nothing. I got nothing because you never saw me. You said that someone else needed your help. Well I needed it too. I needed help too. But not once did you say a single thing to me. I DID EVERYTHING FOR YOU. I asked if nothing in return. Because I thought you would look at me see my pain and see my hurt!
I'm not broken, I'm just bruised.
I'm okay now. I just wish you saw someone but yourself sometimes.
I wish I wasn't so paranoid and angry. I wish a lot of things.
But I'm going to be fine now. I promise I will.
This isn't a problem solved with a pill.
It's solved with and action.
That may have a reaction.
I loved you. You were my friend. .......................
Now...you're ash in the movement of the wind. --- I've become a little obsessed with spoken poetry even if this isn't spoken. It's written so👍🏻 I'm not suicidal. Just sad today. Happy tomorrow
