Enjoy...Like always you're weird if you like everything....ha Lol ok I think that I should stop writing now...SO READ ON PEOPLE :)
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Everyone has a photographic memory. Some don't have film.
He, who laughs last, thinks slowest.
A day without sunshine is like, well, night.
On the other hand, you have different fingers.
Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.
Back up my hard drive? How do I put it in reverse?
When the chips are down, the buffalo is empty Seen it all, done it all, can't remember most of it.
Those who live by the sword get shot by those who don't.
I feel like I'm diagonally parked in a parallel universe.
He's not dead, he's electroencephalographically challenged.
She's always late. Her ancestors arrived on the June flower.
You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say will be misquoted, and then used against you.
I wonder how much deeper the ocean would be without sponges.
Honk if you love peace and quiet.
Pardon my driving, I am reloading.
Despite the cost of living, have you noticed how living remains so popular?
Nothing is foolproof to a sufficiently talented fool.
It is hard to understand how a cemetery raised its burial costs and blamed it on the high cost of living.
The 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there's a 90% probability you'll get it wrong.
It is said that if you line up all the cars in the world end to end, someone would be stupid enough to try and pass them
You can't have everything, where would you put it?
Latest survey shows that 3 out of 4 people make up 75% of the world's population
If the shoe fits, get another one just like it
The things that come to those that wait may be the things left by those who got there first
Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day.
Teach a man to fish and he will sit in a boat all day drinking beer
Flashlight: A case for holding dead batteries
Shin: A device for finding furniture
As long as there are tests, there will be prayer in public schools
A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well
It was recently discovered that research causes cancer in rats
I started out with nothing, and I still have most of it
When you go into court you are putting yourself in the hands of 12 people that weren't smart enough to get out of jury duty.
If you can smile when things go wrong, you have someone in mind to
blame.
When I'm feeling down, I like to whistle. It makes the neighbour’s dog
run to the end of his chain and gag himself.
