Dope Boy Ambitions

L-O-S-T

Monica

The sun was out and shining brightly but my world still seemed to be dark and gloomy.

"Mo can I have some fruit loops please?" Queen asked sitting at the island.

"Sure thing." I said reaching for the box of cereal.

I heard footsteps. I looked up and King was walking down the stairs.

"Oh good morning. I didn't know you came home last night."

"Well I did."

"Do you want breakfast."

"I don't want your nasty ass eggs or pancakes. I'm not in the mood to throw it up." He said lighting a cigarette.

"You know we don't smoke in the house." I said trying to ignore the fact that he totally just called my cooking disgusting. "I'm not liking your attitude."

He sighed and put it out. It was definitely a change in him. Every morning would start off with hugs and kisses and now it's nothing but attitude and aggressiveness.

"What? Do you expect me to wake up all happy and shit?"

"So is this how our life gonna' be now?" I poured cereal into a bowl for Queen.

"What the hell are you talking about."

"I mean are you going to wake up grumpy every morning and hating the world. I understand Nick-"

"Don't Mo, please don't start with this bullshit."

"Well let's not take it there Kingston."

He stood up from the couch. "You're right I'm sorry. Your food ain't that bad baby." He said putting a fake smile on his face.

"Yea whatever. I have stuff to take care of today so you need to watch the girls-"

"Nah not today."

"Yes you are."

"No I'm not. I'm planning Nick's funeral today."

I crossed my arms. "Really? Is that all you're doing? Because the girls could tag along."

"I have other stuff to do to. I'm pretty sure what you have to do isn't that important."

I thought about bringing up the fact that the girls aren't even mine but right now wasn't the time to be petty.

"Okay fine. You go ahead, handle your business."

I walked up the stairs and began to get Miracle dressed. While changing her I called Morgan.

"Hey Morg. I need a favor. Do you mind watch the girls for about three hours or so?"

"Sure. Bring them by. I'll be happy to watch them."

"Thanks you're the best!" I hung up then put Miracle's pacifier in while I got Queen ready.
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I put my car in park as I sat in Dorian's driveway hesitating on going in. Maybe she needs some time alone, maybe she wants some company. Hell, I don't know because she wouldn't answer her phone which has me worried. It's not like her to not answer her phone.

I got out my car and walked up to her front door. I knocked.

"Dori. It's me, Monica." I said still knocking. She didn't open. I know she's home because her car is in the driveway.

I lifted up the mat and found the spare key. I unlocked her door and walked inside.

"Dorian!" I sang out hoping for an answer. "I know you're here girl." I said walking up her stairwell.

When I entered her bedroom I saw her standing by her window smoking.

"Hey, you okay? You're not a smoker." I sat my purse down on her bed.

"It's just one of those times."

"Yea well, smoking isn't good for the baby ya know."

"I'm not worried about it. I'm getting an abortion next week. I already scheduled an appointment."

"What? No! You can't do that."

"It's my choice!" She yelled raising her voice still looking out the window. I couldn't see her face but I'm pretty sure she was crying.

"D come on now. Nick wouldn't have wanted that."

"Nick's gone Mo. He's gone." She said. "They found this in his pocket." She said holding up a wedding ring. "He was going to propose." She broke down.

"Dori." I said walking over to her trying to hug her but she pushed me away.

She walked over to her night stand. "He was going to be my husband, we were going to have a child. We were going to be one big happy family. But now everything's ruined." She pulled out a gun and put it to her head.

"DORI!" I yelled taking the gun from her hands. She dropped to her knees.

"What the hell were you thinking! Killing yourself won't do shit to help you." I took all of the bullets out of the gun and threw them out the window.

"I can't do this." Dorian cried.

I bent down. "Look I know how you feel-"

"No the hell you don't Monica! King is still alive! You have everything you want and need!"

"Okay but-"

"But nothing. Get the fuck out my house."

"Dori no."

"Get out! Get out! Get out!" She yelled throwing things at me. Dorian turned into a totally different person. I guess losing someone you truly love will make you that way.

I walked out her house feeling like my mission was incomplete. I came over here to cheer her up and make her feel like she wasn't alone but I didn't do anything but make her feel worse.

Damn lost a brother and looks like I just lost my best friend. If I lose anything else I don't know what I'll do.