Never Again (AmeCan Book 2) [Under Editing]

chapter 2: changing fate (edited)

Matthew had soon fallen asleep in my arms, his cheeks were flushed pink with tear stains, and his breathing was a bit uneven. When he breathed in and out it was shaky and that worried me a lot, we were both still in the empty room I shifted Matthew into my arms and stood as I carried him bridal style. His head rested against my shoulder and he stirred a bit. "Alfie..." he whimpered. "I'm here Mattie." I reassured in a quiet voice. "The hero is always here for you." I wanted to leave and go home with my Matthew, but I had to stay and wait for the meeting to finish.

With a groan of annoyance I exited the empty room, I struggled with opening the door but I somehow managed to open it. "I'm awake now Alfred, you can put me down." Matthew mumbled groggily. "If I put you down you'll end up falling." I chuckled. "where's kumachi?" he asked wearily and squirmed in my arms, whipping his head side to side with now alert eyes. "Calm down Mattie, I'm sure your little bear friend is hiding or something. Russia probably scared it." I explained. "It is a 'he' Alfred." He frowned. "Okay, he." I huffed and rolled my eyes.

Matthew still squirmed in my arms. "Alfred I'm heavy." He whined. "Dude I'm literally as strong as superman. Maybe even stronger." I stated in a matter-of-fact tone. "Right now it's like I'm carrying a baby, a small whiney one." I stuck my tongue out at him. "Don't be mean." He pouted and looked away, at least I got him to stop struggling though, I laughed and put him down carefully. He stood and slightly swayed back and forth. "How are you feeling Mattie? Is your breathing okay?" I asked as I steadied him. "I'm fine, it's just been a while. I was used to it before." He mumbled.

My blood went cold. "Used to it? What are you talking about?" I asked. "A-ah well, it wasn't exactly the first time something like that happened." He explained in a murmur, his voice wavered when he spoke, I instantly brought him into a tight hug. "How long did it go on for?" I asked warily. "Before you finally noticed me..it was always on the meetings." He said, soft spoken. "I'm sorry..I ruined you're presentation. I should've kept quiet I'm so sorry Alfred." I held him tight and gave him a reassuring squeeze to stop him from panicking again.

I ran my hand through his soft blonde hair and hummed a quiet tune, he instantly relaxed in my arms and buried his face in the crook of my neck, his soft breaths sent shivers down my spine. "Where's Kumacoco?" he asked for his bear once again, I looked around. "Uhm..let's check in the conference room. I'm sure they're about done." I pulled away from the embrace and held his hand in my own. "We'll find him don't worry okay?" I gave him a reassuring smile and dragged him along with me as I walked toward the conference room.

He walked stiffly beside me, I could tell that he was anxious to return, and to be honest I was pretty anxious too. Would Ivan do or say anything? Were the others aware of Matthew now? If so then that made me even more anxious, I pulled him close to me he stumbled and fell on my chest with a small yelp escaping his lips. He grasped onto my shirt and looked down with a dark blush painted on his face. "Alfie you tripped me." He whined. "Sorry Mattie." I chuckled and held him close to my chest. "I got a bit anxious.." I admitted.

I enjoyed sharing my feelings openly with Matthew, and in return he would do the same. I could always be myself with him, and I could always show him my vulnerability and weaknesses without being afraid. I knew his weaknesses and vulnerabilities as well, but he literally lived with them it was so noticeable. The way he trembled and jumped at any loud thing always told me that he was constantly living in fear.

The dark circles under his eyes that looked like bruises on his pale skin told me he wasn't getting enough sleep, or had possible insomnia at times, and that could also explain why he's been getting thinner. Suddenly realizing that I had been dozing off I quickly shook my head to clear my mind, I had almost ran into the conference door I could hear the others talking loudly on the other side. "Alfred I think it's best if I stay out here." Matthew shifted from foot to foot as he fidgited with his tie, I frowned and grabbed both of his hands to stop him from fidgeting. "No way that's happening." I stated.