Cigarettes

Which Team

Christmas had past, May and the concert had past, and then came Summer.

The sun was burning hot, the sky was clear, the atmosphere seemed electric and people felt the need to go to the beach and have fun. No more school. But in order for that to happen they had to pass the exams. Clay hadn't studied all year, his thoughts were elsewhere. He had just move on from Justin. He knew that it didn't matter anymore. But even when he wasn't thinking about him he would sketch and draw or steal his sisters makeup and attempt drag to pass the time instead of studying. He was so anxious about the final exams, though he always managed to do well. Maybe he was just lucky.

But that was not the only thing that made him anxious. Summer was the only season that made him feel so, so, sad.

When he was younger, he always knew he was different and there was a time in 3rd grade that he thought he fell in love. He was so silly at that time. He had that friend that was short with blonde hair and brown eyes, he was cute but not very much, not as a kid and not even now. But he liked him very much and that continued for a few years. So every time Summer arrived and everyone would leave for vacation, he would feel sad. After first listening to Lana Del Rey  he described that feeling as his summertime sadness, that song fitted the situation so well. Everyone remembers their first love, don't you?

But it wasn't that, that made him anxious it was something more recent.

He was sitting with Jojo in the school library and they were studying the subject that they were writing the next day, and Jojo brought up a subject. Now after she had broke up with Marcus she was in a very bad condition. You could clearly see the pain he had left her in her eyes. And so she just wanted her pain to go away. And so she asked Clay about weed. Did she really wanted to do that? To smoke weed? She would tell Clay to stop smoking but was she really willing to smoke weed?

That was something that socked Clay for a moment. He knew a lot of staff about drugs. He had read books and watched movies like "Go ask Alice" or "To write love on her arms". But he had a secret and he couldn't forgive himself for doing what he did. Even if it was for a good cause.

It was Summer, one year ago. August and the sea waters were warmer than ever. He could easily enter the waters this time of year, not like July that he wouldn't cause it cold. He had just found out about "Go ask Alice" a book from the 60's about the real story of a girl that died from drugs and had watched "Twloha" a movie about another girl and how she recovered from their use.

On his vacation he was living in the house of his cousins from Canada, it was all peaceful. There was nothing to worry about. He would sit on the porch with his cousin Andrew and smoke cigarettes late at night and looking at the stars. But when his older cousin came things got an interesting turn. So Chris had two children, but he wasn't the ideal father figure everyone thinks of. He was not even close. Of course he loved them but he had a bad history with drugs. So when he came he had some weed. Suddenly Clay's nights felt alone, he didn't have anyone to talk to. He followed Andrew and Chris to the beach where they sat down on a rock and smoked. He waited for a while and then went near them and said hello. Their eyes had turned red and they were out of this world. Clay tried to ignore the loud noisy music they had playing from Chris's phone. He wanted to leave but he stayed. He really wanted to know what they were actually doing. He then asked Chris, "What a dickhead" he thought. Chris was laughing and told him they had been smocking some weed that he passed from the states. Clay then turned to Andrew and asked him to stop smocking. He replied with the most cliche sentence ever.

"I can stop it whenever I want, It's nothing. Don't worry."

"You should stop it right now! What if Sunday finds out? She wants to become a lawyer, she can't be with someone that smokes weed. And it's illegal."