A Mind of Beauty

Chapter 1

Depression is like a stubborn thunderous cloud bestowed upon you, refusing to move. The only way you can save yourself from the rain of tears and fears is for someone to hold an umbrella over you -- to carry it through the thunder until the storm clears.

Unfortunately, finding someone to do that for you is very difficult these days, hence why I had to do it myself. I didn't mind, I let myself free; exposed — to the pain.

After all, a little rain helps the mind grow, and with some sunshine, the beauty of a mind blossoms into something I've never known.

- Luna Avalon
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Mental illnesses -- flaws. People say they're just born with it, there's nothing they could do about it but allow others to let them seem like a handicap of society; a weak link thats incites a negative impact on them and the people around them.

After all, not everyone is "lucky" enough to have the lives and bodies of people like Kylie Jenner or Brad Pitt. Despite that, we let plugs like social media make us believe we have nothing if we don't have everything, putting us in a dark spiral of depression without even realizing it.

Maybe not all of us were born "defected" or with "nothing". Maybe we were just skipping our way home and happened to fall into a black hole that didn't stop sucking us in.

Because that's what happens when you let it happen. You let yourself believe that you can have a certain life but never move forward, being stuck in the hope, or you think you can change everything there is about you just for a better Instagram post.

Some of us tried to save ourselves from this chain of monstrosity and we really did, but society flipped it back on us. They drove us to insanity and making us think it's all on us, we're some stubborn scars that can't heal — we can't evolve with the rest of crowd just because we like to do our own thing. 

But then again, they only gave us the car. We chose the path to drive ourselves towards. 

Then again, they don't realize for a second that the constant reminder of the apparent isolation is what puts the large slash on our brains, making us people think we're the ones who are crazy and different from others when we interact with them; a wrong different. We look at others and see what we can do to make ourselves better and be accepted; to have the freedom after being accepted by the society norms. 

Think about this. If you really opened your eyes, you would realize that the brave and bloody soldiers who marched back home alive might not have a large apparent scar on their body, but they do have a million scratches on their mind. All of it was in the efforts of trying to get rid of the heart-wrenching memories of reality from their mind. They were only fighting for their country and their freedom, but they were sucked in a black hole of monstrosity which they are still trying to recover from. 

And if you really opened your eyes, you would realize that on Independence Day, their bodies might be free from the grip of a gun, but not their minds. That the trigger is still live in their mind, ready to go off.

The booming fireworks might not be a symbol for freedom for them, but a reminder of the explosions that kill — that kill their minds of everything good in the world.

***
Tick tock. Time is running but I'm afraid it might stop.

My eyes followed the clock. My hand gripped the chair while the other bounced the small ball up and down against the floor. I'm waiting, don't know for what exactly yet, but I have a feeling it's something for the better. It might take me a lifetime to achieve it, and even though I don't have a lifetime, I can surely try.