Next Time

Next Time: A Klangst Oneshot

 The fighter crashed into the side of blue. They rammed into the Galras canon, the course switched. Keith was in the line of fire. If it weren't for Keith's amazing reflexes he wouldn't be here. Lance shudders at the memory. He had already been yelled at by the team profusely. Even Hunk had been disappointed. He apologized but it wasn't enough. Keith had gone straight to his room. Lance sighed, it was happening again. The feelings were coming back. He'd never had a day as bad as this one. They don't need me. They need to find another paladin. Thoughts were running through Lance's head. He ran faster to the training deck. He grabbed a dagger. "Initiate training sequence!" He took down the dummies one by one, the thoughts assaulting his mind. He stabbed the last dummy, he couldn't bring himself to summon another one. He broke down, sobs rattling around in his chest. Tears dripping and staining the dummy. The dummy evaporated and he was left staring at the dagger. Remove the problem, Blue is the most friendly, it won't be hard to find another paladin. She chose you, after all, the small voice in his head whispers to him.

He looks at the dagger in his hands. He touches the point to his arm, drawing blood to wash over all the other scars. It isn't enough. He can't feel it. He takes the dagger in his shaking hands, raises his hands above his head, ready to plunge it into his gut. He hesitates, he'd never get to tell Keith he loved him. Tears run down against his face. His hands are shaking. Maybe Hunk will tell him. He begins to lower the dagger but it's wrestled from his hands. He's startled, he scrambles back away from this person. He blinks the tears away to see Keith kneeling in front of him. The dagger lay between them and Lance's gaze shifts to it for a second. Keith's eyes widen as he realizes, lance was actually going to do it. He took the dagger and threw it away from them, across the floor. Keith slowly, but gently crawls up to Lance. He takes his arm into his hand and shakes his head.

"Lance are you ok?" Keith asked softly. He knew Lance was obviously not ok, but he needed to see how much trust Lance had in him.

"I-I'm fine, just a bad day is all," Lance said flashing his signature smile, washing away any signs he was upset. This startled Keith. He finally saw how fake lance's smiles were. "How are you? That was a close call today," Lance said after a moment.

"Yeah no thanks to you," Keith teased, he needed to see Lance's reaction.

Lance's face fell. Fresh tears welled in his eyes. He looked for the dagger and spotted it ways to his left. "Go away Keith I'm training," He said, voice filled with emotion. He got up and walked to the dagger. Slowly picking it up, hoping Keith wouldn't notice.

"Lance," Keith said softly, he rushed up and took the dagger away from him. He threw it to the side and took Lance's hands in his own. "I wasn't serious." lance stayed silent and Keith didn't know what to do. He squeezed Lance's hands and looked him in the eye. "Lance, I wasn't serious!"

"Then why did you say it?" Lance shouted, tears streaming down his cheeks. "I know you hate me, Keith, I get it but I can't-- I can't do this anymore!" Keith stood there, stunned but he didn't let go of Lance's hands. "Everyone has a part on this team. Pidge is the genius, Shiro is our leader, Hunk is also a genius but his food makes everyone happy, Allura is the princess and we wouldn't have much without her. Coran is always keeping things up around the castle and then there's you," Lance was rambling and his voice cracked. "You're the amazing pilot who always has everyone's back on the team. You never falter, your fighting is perfect and technique is beautiful. I'm just here, I just exist. Hardly bringing anything to the team, and no one cares about my feelings, so I keep them to myself but then I hurt Voltron because I'm slowly drifting away. So I want to remove myself from the problem. Pidge won't care, she hardly acknowledges my existence, Shiro would just be disappointed because now you have to find another paladin, Hunk would be upset at first maybe but then it's just one less mouth to feed. And you," Lance pulled a face. "You hate me, you'd be happy this silly rivalry is over... the rivalry I started." Lance pulled his hands away to hide his face as he began to sob. Keith stood in shock, he looked at the dagger in his hands and back at Lance. He dropped the dagger with a loud thud, startling Lance making shocking blue meet soft purple. Keith gently pulled Lance's hands into his own. He reached out and cupped Lance's face. Keith sniffed and rubbed his eyes with his other hand.

"Lance don't say that none of that is true!" Keith said.

"You're just saying that you don't mean it!" Lance yelled.

"Lance, obviously you're not aware of the things you're capable of," Keith said slowly inching closer. "You have the best shot on the team, I mean remember when you shot that looser in the arm? We wouldn't have won that battle if it weren't for you,"

"Luck," Lance muttered but Keith could see he was slowly feeling better. Even if it was barely a crawling paste.

"You jumped in front of Coran and shielded him from the explosion. That was pretty brave and selfless. Then, that mission we had together, on the Balmara you probably saved my life. Who knows what I would have done had I just run in and started killing things. We could have been ambushed." Keith went on, noticing the light Lance was gaining in his eyes.

"You are pretty hot headed," Lance said with a weak laugh. Keith chuckled before continuing.

"And you're jokes, you always know how to lighten the mood and take stress off our shoulders. Even if it's for just a second, you give us something else to focus on." Keith bit his lip before continuing, trying to stay on safe ground. "And your smile lights up the room when it's really genuine. I guess that's not often, but even your fake smile lights up the room too. You're always there to keep the team up and their spirits high."

"Keith, do you mean any of this?" Lance asked softly.

"Of course. I'm not just saying it. The team all thinks this of you, I-I think it of you. We all care about you, we would all care so much if you... if you decided to leave. I would care so much because I don't hate you, Lance. I-it's quite the opposite. I'm pretty sure I'm in love with you, and I can't think of being on this ship knowing you'd never come back." Keith confessed, not breaking eye contact with Lance. Lance suddenly tackled Keith in a strong embrace, burying his face in the smaller boys hair.

"Keith if you're kidding about any of this, I will not hesitate next time," Lance whispered.

"There won't be a next time, I refuse to let there be a next time," Keith whispered back. Lance began to cry again but not as violently as before.

"I love you, Keith, I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry," Lance began to apologize and Keith pulled back giving him a confused look.

"I almost killed you today," Lance said. The gravity of how that affected Lance hit Keith like a brick. Lance suddenly fell to the floor and covered his face. Keith crouched down and pulled Lance into his lap. Lance cried into his shoulder. They stayed like that until Lance calmed down. "Keith, I love you so much," Lance muttered.

"I love you too," Keith whispered and he pulled back to place a soft kiss on Lance's lips. "Let's get you patched up, and away from the sharp objects." Lance sniffed and nodded. "Lance, if you ever feel like this again, I need you to come talk to me, ok?"

"What if I can't?" Lance asked.

"You can you always will be able to, because I will never stop loving you."

"And I won't stop loving you, but what if I stop loving myself? What if next time you're not there fast enough and you're too late?"

"I'll make you better Lance. We'll get through this together." It occurred to Keith how messed up Lance really was. But that was ok because Keith wouldn't let there be a next time.

A/N: Hey, it's AngelQ giving you that little dose of angst. No flames I hope you enjoyed and if anyone ever feels like this feel free to talk to me... the fandom is here for you.  Hope to see you in the next story! Hopefully, it will not be so depressing... hehe no promises. 

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