from the beginning

facing facts!

I'm sitting in my big red chair looking at my phone screen when i hear footsteps towards me i look up i have a serious look on my face its bake he hands me an envelope

"whats this" as i open it i now have pharell and adam's attention

"yeah blake what is it" adam says cheekily

i open it to see my earring

pharrell starts talking

"why do you have Gwen's earring "

adam giggles and starts talking himself

"pharrell you know blake has a nice butt?!" adam says

"ahh so the bromance is real" pharrell replies

"ahh not quite let's just say I've had a good view recently" says adam

pharrell is confused

I'm getting worried what if adam says something

"blake go sit down" i say he looks rejected but obeys

i see pharrell's eyes widen as he bounces his eyes back and forth to me and blake he then looks at adam with a concerned face adam looks away and immediately looks at me mouthing "sorry" i gulp and look over at pharrell as he walks over to me and asks to talk, pharrell is one of my best friends so i follow him back stage

"what the hell gwen you're dating blake now you just got divorced"

"no!!!!!!" i say quickly

"well what was that then"

"ok well maybe we hooked up once but don't worry it's not going to happen again"

pharrell looks disappointed in me but nothing comes out of his mouth

"i will talk to him now then" i say

i walk over to blake's chair he grins

"blake can we talk?"

"sure"

we walk and talk

"so listen i have a lot going on in my life at the moment and I'm just really confused with life and I'm not sure if i like you or not but at the moment i really just have to focus on me and the boys! i hope you understand"

" gwen you don't need to worry i totally understand i mean hell you just got out of a twenty year relationship i would be concerned if you weren't confused and listen i do like you but I'm cool with being just friends and if you need to talk just remember I'm going through a divorce too and I'm happy to talk"

"thanks for understanding i might take you up on that offer at some point"

he grins and holds his hand out and says "to just friends"

"to just friends" i reply with a smile griping his hand

........

when we are finish shooting we all head to our trailers and get changed i put on the usual jeans and a tee when i think everyone is gone i plonk on the bed i couldn't be bothered to go home the boys were at their dads they were visiting family in london for 3 months it was a long time to spend without my boys!, i started crying hysterically about my messed up life i got up and had a shot of whiskey i turn on the radio i don't know who's playing but it's good i hear a knock on the door i turn off the radio and stumble over to the door it was blake

"ahhhhh blake thank goodness you're here i need somebody to dance with" i say unaware of what i was saying blake comes in puts the lid on the whisky and picks me up and puts me on the bed

"woah you're moving fast cowboy" i say unbuttoning his shirt he stops me and just sits next to me and comforts me he pulls my head down on to his shoulder, i start crying

"it's ok you're allowed to cry do you need anything?"

"maybe a movie" i say

" i can do that" he setts up a movie on my laptop and starts heading out the door

"wait" i say as he turns around

"can you just stay?, stay!" i say

he nods his head and says "i told you i was here to talk, i don't break promises"