The fifth Angel

8. The Born-Again Identity

I looked around. It was night. A person suddenly ran past me. Wait? "Sam?!" I shouted, running after him. He past a gate and walked along a heavily-graffitied alleyway. A woman was buying drugs from a Dealer. The woman left and Sam walked closer to the Dealer. "Dude. Get the hell away from me." He said. Sam rubbed a hand over his face. I walked over to him. He looked exhausted. Scratch that. He looked like hell. "You speak friggin' English? Go away!" The Dealer said again. "It's okay. No one's after me." Sam muttered. I took him by the shoulders and looked at him. "Sophia?" He asked shocked. "Why are you running up in here like that?" He asked Sam. "Shut up." I told the Dealer. "Sam?" I asked. Sam suddenly slided down to the ground with his back against a post. "Sam. Hey, hey." I said quietly. "What the hell did you take, anyway?" The Dealer asked. "Nothing." Sam answered, holding his face in his hands. "Gah! I just need some rest." Sam stood up again and started walking. "Little Winchester! What the hell happened to you? Where's Dean?" I asked. "Ugh!" "How many days you been up, anyway?" The Dealer asked. I turned to him, angry. "Don't you have anything else to do, you son of a bitch?" I asked and put two fingers to his head. The Dealer fell to the ground, unconscious. I turned back to Sam. "He was right. How long are you up?" I asked. "I- don't- five days." Was his answer. "Sam. What the hell? That's it. I'm going to get you to sleep." I put two fingers to his forehead and he fell down. I opened a car and laid Sam down. Not five minutes later he woke up and got out of the car. That's impossible. He should be unconscious for at least an hour... He looked back at the car, confused. He was hallucinating! "Sam. I want you to listen to me closely. Whatever you're seeing... It's not real. Nothing else is here. No one else." I said softly. Sam started walking, ignoring me. He was breathing heavily and blinking rapidly. "Sam. Please. You need help." I pleaded. Sam started running. "Sam!... Sam!! Road!!!" I shouted. A car hit Sam and sent him onto the windshield, over the car and to the ground. I ran to him as fast as I can. "Sam... Call 911." I told the driver. "I didn't see him. I'm sorry." He said. "Call 911, now!" I shouted. I touched his head and healed the biggest injuries. I can't fully heal him. The driver would be freaked at how Sam was fine after such an impact.

The ambulance came and took Sam. "Let me through." I said and entered. "Miss? And you are?" The paramedic asked. "I'm his sister in law. Sophia Smith." I replied. Sister in law? Oh, never mind.

"Sophia." I turned around and saw Dean. "Hey." I said. "Where is he? Where is my brother?" Dean asked, sounding really stressed.
We opened the door to Dr. Kadinsky and entered, followed by a nurse. "Okay, sir? Miss? You can't just barge in here without an appointment!" "They said, 'Talk to Kadinsky'. You Kadinsky?" Dean asked the Doctor. "You need to be scheduled!" The nurse pointed out. "Well, then, schedule us!" I said loudly. "He was in a car crash. Why the hell can't I see him?" Dean asked. "You're Sam Smith's brother and Sophia Smith's husband?" The Doctor asked. Dean glanced at me questionable. "Yeah, what's going on?" He asked. "It- it's fine. Thank you. Really." Dr. Kadinsky said and the nurse left. "Sam was admitted. He was treated for a broken rib and lacerations." "Okay. That's not too bad. And?" Winchester asked. "And...  he's on our locked psychiatric floor." The Doctor finished. His hallucinations must be worse than I thought. "I mean, he's had some trouble..." Dean muttered. "So you're aware that Sam is experiencing a full-blown psychotic episode?" He asked. "What?" I asked.
"Psychotic? Come on. I mean, the guy's... It's not like the guy's freakin' Norman Bates." Dean stated. "No, I'm sure he isn't. We need to determine whether his state was brought on by the insomnia or whether the insomnia is a symptom of his condition. Do you understand? So that we can figure out how to treat him." "Well, all I can say is that the sleep thing is- is kind of new." Dean told him. "Right. Well... we've pumped him about as full of sedatives as we safely can. So far, he won't go under. I've never seen anything like it." Yeah, me neither. The Doctor pushed a button to enter Ward D2. A sign on the wall and the door read 'High Security Area'. We walked down the hallway in the ward and stopped in front of a room. Dr. Kadinsky opened the door and let us in. Sam was on the bed, dressed in a white T-shirt and white hospital pants. "How are you feeling?" Dean asked his brother. "Maybe you should cancel my UFC fight." Sam whispered.
Dean sat down on the end of Sam’s bed. "Can you help him?" Dean asked me. "I- I don't know. It's something I've never seen before. There's nothing to- to rebuild." I said sadly. "Sam, I'm gonna find you help." Winchester told his little brother. Sam exhaled and looked away. "You heard Sophia. Besides I don't think it's out there, Dean." Sam replied. "We don't know that." He said. "We know better than most. It's all snake oil. Last faith healer we hooked up with had a reaper on a leash. Remember?" Sam asked as Dean stood up, looking at me. "Yeah, Sam, I remember." "I'm just saying..."
"What? That you don't want my help?" Dean asked, cutting his brother off. I need to find something. Like now. "No, I'm just saying... don't do this to yourself. Neither you, Sophia." I looked confusingly at Sam. "Little Winchester, if we don't find something-" "Then I'll die. Dean, we knew this was coming." Sam said. "No." "When you put my soul back-" "No." Dean repeated, but Sam continued anyway: "Cas warned you about all the crap it would-" "Screw Cas! Quit being Dalai frickin' Yoda about this, okay?" Dean said and punched his hand with his fist. "Get pissed!" "I'm too tired. This is what happens when you throw a soul into Lucifer's dog bowl. And you think there's just gonna be some cure out there?" Sam asked. I looked down. I should have been there, stopping it somehow. Sam looked at us sadly as Dean nodded and bit his lip. "You go. If you find something, call me. I'm gonna watch over him." I told Winchester and he left the room. "Sam. I promise. I'll do everything to help you." I muttered. Sam was sitting in the edge of the bed. I left the room and sat down in the reception.

'Sophia? Sophia?' Dean? 'I'm in front of the hospital.' I walked outside to see- "Castiel." "Hello, Sophia."

Castiel and I appeared in front of Sam. Demon? Sam was strapped to the bed and shaking from electric shocks.
The Demon turned towards the electroshock machine, or more importantly, us. Castisl put a hand on his head to smite him. The Demon fell to the ground with his eyes burnt out. I turned off the electroshock machine and took away the electrodes on Sam's head. "I should never have broken your wall, Sam. I'm here to make it right." Castiel said and touched Sam's head. "I tried already, Castiel. It doesn't work." I whispered. "You're not real." Sam just muttered.
"Oh, Sam... I'm so sorry." Castiel said.

Dean, Castiel and I were standing in Sam's room. "What the hell do you mean you can't?" Dean asked. "If Sophia couldn't heal him, I can't either. There's nothing left to rebuild." Castiel stated. "Why not?" Dean asked.
"Because it crumbled. The pieces got crushed to dust by whatever's happening inside his head right now." Castiel explained. "So you're saying there's nothing? That he's gonna be like this until his candle blows out?" Dean asked us. "I'm sorry. This isn't a problem I can make disappear. And you know that... But I may be able to shift it." Castiel said thoufully. "Shift?" Dean and I asked confused. "Yeah, it would get Sam back on his feet." Castiel sat down on the bed close to Sam. "It's better this way. I'll be fine." Casteil stated as Sam flinched. "What are you doing, Castiel?" I asked. "Now, Sam... This may hurt. And if I can't tell you again. I'm sorry I ever did this to you." Wait... "Cas! No!" I shouted and ran to him. Then my world turned black once more.