The Girl Called Red

Chapter 7.

Just before dawn I snuck out of the apartment. My mess of hair was brushed and neatly pushed behind my ears, two studs shining in the predawn light. 

For once I had actually put some effort in to look... Nice.

So naturally, as soon as I left the safety of the small apartment building I cursed myself. You're going to Joey's to sort things out. Why are you so bloody nervous?! 

My boots stomped on the pavement as they moved from muscle memory, a large hood coming down to cover my eyebrows. Think about something else. After that precise thought, Aife entered my mind.

"I know you lost control." Her voice seemed... Dead. Her thick accent suddenly gone. "How often does that happen to you?" Her eyes burned holes into me as the sound of Anastasia snoring rang out.

"Not as much as it used to." I rubbed the back of my neck as I refused to reach her eyes.

I knew better than to lose control. But after Alexei...

"Almost never." She told me, as if I didn't already know. "The man is dead, and you are not who you once were. You cannot allow him to have control over you as he once did, Red." I looked away, towards the front door. "Once you walk out that door, I can no longer protect you. You need to control yourself. You need to move forward." 

She sighed, and brushed her hair behind her ears. "My only love killed my only son... I know what it is like to break, Lidiya. You do not have as many years to live as I do." Her eyes glistened. "You need to not let your pain control you."

"You don't look like you follow your own advice." She sighed again, a sad sound.

"We both lost a part of ourselves. We will always grieve, but we must move on..." Her back straightened as her whole body became stronger. "We are warriors, you and I. A rare breed nowadays. I did not let my sister, Scáthach, break me. You will not let him."

So, it's true... She is the Aife of the old Legends... They left out the part that she was a witch. I had thought to myself, as if I had ever expected any less.

"I thought you were forced to end hostilities with your sister." At that Aife scoffed, a dark glint forming in her eye.

"No man'll tell me what to do. Not even me own love." She winked at me and held out her hand. "Take these if yer goin' to meet yer boy. They'll suit you." In her hand was a pair of studs. I had no doubt in my mind that they were pure diamond.

My fingers brushed against one of the earrings, the sharp edge scraping. She was right. I lost control the other night. That is against my training and I was sloppy. 

The worst part was, deep down I had already known I would be. Yet I still didn't change a thing.

Bodies flowed around me, not touching. The only time people touched me, was when I was working. 

My thoughts flashed to one of "Eric's" bodyguards. His hands had touched me, yet he had still been a talker, so I could get information without doing anything too nauseating. 

If it had not been for when I was young... Would I be a virgin to this day? I was sure the only reason I had never let anyone know me 'biblically' was because that choice had been taken from me before.

Men and women both coveted sex. Both would steal that choice when they chose fit.

No one could be trusted.

Never.

Not even Joey? I shut out the thought, my stomping becoming louder.

Pathetic. The smell of coffee almost caused me to detour, the steam curling through my nose down into my churning stomach.