Once Upon A Broken Heart

2

Today was the day where I questioned why I was made to be on this earth. Today was the day I was judged so critically that it would seem like I was in court and I was judged just for being me.

Today was the day I go to high school.

I didn't want to freak out or anything but it's not like I chose when I wanted to freak out. I set out a pair of black skinny jeans and a loose white cropped shirt that hung over my shoulder. It wasn't mine though. I had borrowed it from Juliet's closet. I had intended to give it back because I didn't want to be an nuisance. She wouldn't mind I know that but what belonged to her, will always remain her's. I don't want to take something that isn't mine.

When Juliet was alive she used to tell me what to wear. She was the biggest help in my life because I have a tremendous fear of looking horrible. Although, I would never have to worry with her in my life. It was like she was my angel. Every time I needed to make a life or death decision she would always know what to chose. She helped me alot.

I miss her so much.

Everyday I have this little ritual that I would wake up, get dressed and wear one of her converse because then it would feel like whenever I looked down she was still here. It was also an excuse to walk into her room and breathe in her strawberry aroma that filled her entire room.

Its been a year, yet it feels like eternity.

"Emma!" My mother called me and I fixed my straightened brown hair one last time. This would be the moment where I asked Juliet if I looked okay and every day she would tell me the same line.

Smile, because your smile's beautiful.

Those 5 words changed my life, made me feel less insecure, made me feel beautiful. That was something only Juliet could do. There was not a minute of the day where I went without thinking about her.

"COMING MOM" I yelled and ran into Juliets room and sprayed on her favorite perfume, brushed my hair  with her brush and looked at her room one more time. It was exactly how she left it.

Clothes on the floor, bed undone, closet door wide open, One Direction posters hanging everywhere, with the occasional Ross Lynch or Marianas trench posters and her paintings surrounding her bed. Her little desk sitting next to her window. Her poems and short stories scattered all over the desk. Her bedroom painted a light shade of blue on three walls and one wall was a darker blue.

I remember painting this room with her.

BEFORE

So why are you gonna wear tomorow?" I asked, tongue tied, I was about to correct myself but she spoke.

"Why? Because going nude would be highly unproffesional" She replied and I burst out laughing.

"Juliet! That was SCANDALOUS" I said laughing as I painted her wall and she stared at me for the longest time then her face broke into a smile and soon she was laughing.

"What does that even mean?" She asked, wiping her tears but failing, getting paint all under her eye.

"Genius" I said and she smiled.

"You know you love me" She said and I rolled my eyes.

"How can I not your my TWIN LOSER" I reminded her for the thousandth time and she rolled her eyes.

"Thank you captain obvious, please enlighten me oh smart one." Juliet said and I laughed.

"You're so stupid sometimes" I said and she giggled like a little child.

"Silly me. I forgot your a GRANDMA" She said and I gasped.

"I'm only 13!"

"Yeah but you act like your 93" She said and I snorted.