Stripped

Counting Stars

“Hey, you okay?”

Annie walked in still wearing the lining of her wedding dress. It’s her entourage’s final fitting and all I could think of was RJ, the guy who reminded me that after every sunset, the sun rises again.

“Yeah. I’m okay.” I looked at my beautiful sister and couldn’t help but envy her. I smiled weakly as she slowly sat next to me on the white lounger at the boutique, careful not to get stabbed by all the pins on her dress lining.

“Maine… I’m really sorry I’m putting you through this. Even if you don’t tell me, I know the memories of Andrew and your wedding are still haunting you. And I’m not going to tell you to stop reminiscing. I am never going to tell you to forget the past. But you also need to think of your future… or at least your present. Please don’t let the past stop you from pursuing the future you’ve always dreamed of. One of these days, you'll have to let go and open up to someone new. The first step to healing is to accept that although there will be scars, in time, it will fade and eventually go away."

I couldn’t really blame her for misinterpreting my melancholy. Two years ago, we were here too, only I was in my wedding dress and she was scolding me about how it was bad luck to try on the full dress.

“Annie, I wasn’t… it’s nothing. Just ignore me. It’s the weather, look at how gloomy it is. I feel like it’s going to rain on your wedding.” I looked out the window in the hopes that Annie would get distracted and just drop the subject.

“Wait a minute. Please don’t tell me it’s the stripper.” I side-eyed her. There's really nothing I could keep from her.

“It’s still him, huh?" She asked. I pursed my lips and stared at the heavy gray skies.

"I knew it. You know what? I’m beginning to regret forcing you to pretend to be the bachelorette that night. I only wanted you to experience it because you didn’t when you were going to get married. Uggh. This is all my fault. And now you’re sulking!” She pouted like she always did whenever she thought she'd gotten me in trouble.

“I am not sulking! And please, can we tone it down with the ‘stripper.’” I said through gritted teeth, wary that someone might hear us.

“But you are thinking about him!”

“Okay! Okay. I can’t forget the kiss, okay? Sometimes I still dream of it. Then I wake up only to be reminded of his eyes. I don’t know, Annie! I feel so stupid that I didn’t tell him about not being the real bride to be! Or maybe you’re right! Maybe I’m just reminiscing about my own wedding that never happened.”

Tears involuntarily started streaming down my face. And I frantically tried to look around for a box of tissue. Having found none, I wiped my tears with the sleeve of my shirt. Annie huffed and patted my shoulder in frustration.

“I’d hug you right now, but I have pins all over me!”

We both burst out laughing and cried at the same time.

“I’m sorry we lost his number. I swear to God, when you get engaged again, we’ll go with a real stripper company and not this underground shit that our friends found.”

“It’s okay, sis. And even if we had his number, it’s not like I can just call him and then what? Tell him, ‘hey, this is Maine, I was the bride to be that you kissed on top of the Stratosphere, coffee?’

"Correction, you kissed him first." Annie reminded me with one eyebrow raised.

"Fine! Must you remind me everytime? Jeez! Still! I can't just call and introduce myself." I said in frustration.