Broken

.day ten.

Esther

The train jolted side to side, and I gripped the pole and stopped myself from falling forward.

Except, I wasn't standing up, and I wasn't holding a pole I was laying on some kind of hard surface, my hands cold and empty, and silence flooded my ears. Wait, was that right? Why would I hear silence? No, I couldn't. I felt pain shooting up my side, burning, like it was on fire. I didn't want to open my eyes, scared of what awaited me if I did. I had to know where I was... when I was. I forced them open, and was met with a clear ceiling revealing orange, pink, blue, red, black. The stars were little white dots in the sky, not forming anything. It was nighttime, but how? We were supposed to be there by 5 in the evening, not... not ten.

My hand ran along my shirt, and I caught a gap in the fabric, and I pressed into the area. I bit my lip until I tasted blood to stop myself from screaming when pins and needles pierced through my fingers, and white flashed in front of my eyes.

I felt a hand being placed on my head, and a fuzzy figure walked into my vision. I could see the echo of yellow hair and emerald eyes. I could see the echo of concern and emptiness.
The person focused and blurred several times, and all I wanted to do was go back to sleep. I was peaceful. I was okay. Why did I wake up?

"Esther?" a voice squeaked, my name coming out soft and broken. Not like before. The voice had sounded terrified, in denial. Here, she sounded defeated. I blinked, and I saw marks on the girl's pale face.

"H-Hanna..." I sat up as soon as she let her hand drop from my skin, and instantly yelped as electricity coursed through my hip, letting my head fall back on the seats.

"Everything okay back there?" A low and gruff voice called from the front of the subway, making me tense a bit when it reached my ears.

"Yes, everything's fine. Don't worry!" another male voice replied. I tried to breathe deeply, but I couldn't. Something couldn't let me. A blackened strand of hair fell in my face, and I ran my hands along it, my fingers coming away dark with ash. It was slowly becoming clear. The explosion, the pain. The darkness.

"You were out for 10 hours, Esther," Hanna whispered, squeezing my hand to help me sit up, slowly. I swung my legs over the edge, ignoring the bandage rubbing against my skin. "For all of the red line, we kept waiting for you to come back, but... you didn't. We thought we lost you."

I buried my head in my hands, letting the constricting feeling pass before looking back up at my sister. I tilted my head to the side, but there was a pinch in my neck, and I straightened. "Was it really that bad?"

Someone else stepped into view. Tyler. His hair was flat, disheveled, his dark eyes vacant, though I could see a glistening layer over the color. "If you were out for ten hours, then yes, it was bad," he said, his words on edge. When he inhaled, his breath shook, and he turned away for a second. My gaze switched to the ground, and I was sitting silent for a long while.

Shouldn't it have been the other way around? Shouldn't Hanna be the one more concerned, and not Tyler? The cousin I barely knew was more worried about me than my own blood?

He shook his head, looking back at me, looking me over, almost as if I would sink back into the realm of darkness if he let his gaze drift of me for even a second. There was an elongated silence that hung over the subway, like it was impossible to break, impossible to find the words.

Finally, he said, "If it makes you feel any better, after your... your freak accident, this one"–he gestured to Hanna with a turn of his head, eyes cold–"almost got caught by the cops that were looking for her. The ones that came earlier today and almost blew our cover? I was barely able to talk them out of it before they got to take her."

I crossed my arms over my chest, attempting to give her a glare, but it was stopped short by tears blurring my vision. I could see the sheepish look on my older sister's face. "Sorry, Ty. Esther..."

She turned to me, and I felt her palm growing warm, her pounding pulse through her fingertips. The hesitation and fear showed in her bright eyes, and she bit her lower lip, looking past me for a second. I saw a calculating spark crossing her pupils before she focused back on me. She placed a hand on my cheek, and her thumb brushed away a tear trailing down my face.

"Esther, listen to me. Whatever happens, I just want you to know that everything I did was... was for you. It might not seem like that, but..."

I raised an eyebrow, a gurgling laugh escaping me. My grip on her hand tightened. "Hanna... Why would you say that?"

She smiled, her fingers falling to her lap, leaving streaks of warmth on my skin. I looked up at Tyler, whose eyes were locked on whatever was in front of him. We were plunged into darkness, and the brakes squealed against the tracks.

"Because we're there."