new boy || awsten knight (discontinued)

8% | fairy lights

-jordan's pov.-

awsten and i haven't been sitting with our normal "group", kaitlyn is now sitting over there. i think zeke and her are a thing.

good they can be sluts together. maybe she'll back off awsten. i also think she's trying to steal my friends as well, that's also good she can have them because they never cared either.

it was friday afternoon and awsten was i guess "going to make up" our date from yesterday. he invited me to stay over tonight, like i said my moms chill and so is his. [NO SMUT CHILDREN DIS IS FLUFF TO MAKE UP FOR THE DRAMA]

i was getting ready doing the usual. shower, dress, makeup. he said dress comfy.

what the fuck involves comfy clothes for a date out? 

i put on a twenty one pilots sweatshirt, a white tank under the it, and some black sweats. i brought some extra clothing in case that was "too comfy". i grabbed my overnight bag and put on my shoes. soon enough i heard awstens music blaring and his horn.

"hello babe" awsten smiled.

"hiya my princess" i chuckled.

we drove for a minute and then i realized we were going to his house.

a date at his house?

we walked in and his mom was sitting at the kitchen table. both of our dads had walked out on us.

"jordan! great to see you."

awstens mom knew we were doing anything so did my mom. we already had this conversation. ew.

"great to see you too miss knight." i smiled at her. his mom liked me and i was thankful for that. my mom liked awsten as well and i was also thankful for that.

"so we're having a date here?" i giggled.

he smiled at me then grabbed my hand pulling me upstairs to his room. i walked into the small cozy room. he had made a fort with a little elves set up in the center. fairy lights were everywhere and then there was a tv with "stranger things: episode one". there was even snacks and drinks, what a sweetheart.

i got super excited and practically jumped into awstens arms. i attacked his cheek with kisses. i loved stranger things and forts and just ah everything. love was an understatement actually.

we crawled into the little fort, i grabbed an orange juice and my favorite bag of chips. bless awsten. he also had gotten me a strawberry smoothie from zest. damn he knew me well.

soon enough i got comfy lying on awstens chest. i of course had to take a picture of us together. awsten had his glasses on instead of contacts, he looked adorable. we both made cute faces and i posted it to my story with the caption:

"stranger things with this strange boy 🤓"

i of course for instagram had to grab my actual camera and take one. i'd post it later.

every once in a while i jumped like always, i've seen stranger things multiple times and it gets me every time. this was awstens first time though, he had only chosen it because i talked about it non stop. he was holding me and kept squeezing me every time something freaks him the fuck out. between you and me, awsten jumps at the stupidest things sometimes but it's adorable.

it was around 3 in the morning when we finished the whole season. we planned on staying up all night.

"that show was amazing holy shit when does the next season come out?" he questioned, in happy he liked it.

"halloween and i literally am soooo excited!"

"i know what we're doing halloween!" he exclaimed.

i wasn't sure how it really happened but we starting making out. i'd only gone farther with zeke. i hadn't thought about it for a while, but i really wasn't interested in sex, i know that probably sounds weird but i don't know. i knew we wouldn't go any farther though, awsten isn't like that.

we kept it going for a while, i played with his duck tails. my hands ran through his faded blue hair. i could tell it was driving him crazy.

he broke the kiss, i was grinning like an idiot.

"you know that smile is beautiful." now he was grinning.

he's just saying that

your smile is ugly, you know it

i pushed the voices aside for a while. it was the first time in a week or two that they had spoken up. we started to kiss again.

eventually we stopped and just cuddled. it was 4:21, i still didn't want to sleep. awsten was drifting off while the birds in my mind were just being too noisy.

"awsten?"

"hmm" he replied sleepily.

"do you ever think about how one small thing can change everything?"

he sat up and looked at me.

"like when i'm driving, i could just pull the steering wheel into another lane and possible end my life and others." i sighed knowing i was probably worrying him. "or like i could just vanish and not come back. move somewhere random to another country and just never turn back."

his eyes were wide now.

"but the only thing stopping me or anyone else who thinks about possibilities is the thought of it being the wrong thing to do. but then again that little thought could be ignored and i could change everything with the slightest change of mind."

"sometimes i do j, i think everyone does." he started.

"does it ever terrify you? because i am so scared of my own head."

at this point he had pulled me into his chest, i think i really was worrying him. i promise i don't mean to, it's just late night thinking really gets to me.

"sometimes, jordan are you okay?"

"yes, i am fine."

lies

all lies

"lies, j you need to come to me when your not feeling good." he almost said in a whisper.

"i'm sorry i have such mood swings." i said. sometimes i feel like i'm bipolar between sad and happy.

"it's okay not to be okay."

he's wrong, it makes you a freak

people like you are nothing

i decided not to tell him the voices were back and with that i closed my eyes, ignoring the whispering voices or at least trying to.

i made it through the night with only one wake up from ond nightmare. i've been having a lot lately but decided to keep that my little secret.

A/N: jordan is me for real. sometimes i am so bipolar, sorry guys. but anyways enjoy the story! i hopefully will be writing some more because this is my last pre-written chapter i have from when i was in africa and i don't have much time with school. much love to you guys -a 💕