Autobiography of the clique

The Life of Cameron

"This is the autobiography of Cameron Nate Fisher."

"With commentary from the one and only Derrick Luke Harrington."

"What? Derrick get out of my autobiography!"

"I don't think so Cammy I'm here to stay! Trust me it'll do your autobiography some good."

"You always ruin everything Derrick!"

"Hey Cammy just tell your lame story already would you?"

"It's not lame! Anyways I was born on a glorious day. On August 12, 1998, the world rejoiced-"

"Yes than I was born on August 20, 1998 which took all the attention away from Cam's birth because let's face it people, I'm much better than Cam."

"No you're not! Why don't you go make your own autobiography Derrick!"

"Hmmp! Maybe I will!"

"Good!"

"Fine!"

"Back to my story, I was always a shy little kid growing up. But just because I was shy doesn't mean I didn't have any friends in fa-"

"You had zero friends! Until I felt bad for you and allowed you to become my friend!"

"DERRICK?! What are you doing here? I told you to write your own autobiography!"

"I was going to, but then I wouldn't be able to comment on your autobiography, then no one would want to read it. Then you would go cry like a little baby-"

"ARE YOU SAYING THAT MY AUTOBIOGRAPHY IS BORING?!"

"No, I'm saying YOUR boring."

"Isn't it you're boring?"

"Yes Cameron! YOU ARE boring! Glad we're finally on the same page!"

"Derrick?"

"Yes my dear Cammy?"

"LEAVE!"

"I'm good right here! But thank you for asking Cam, glad you care about me! Just continue your story so you don't bore your readers anymore than you already have!"

"Fine, I'll continue my story! And it's not boring! Where was I? Hmm, oh yes! Pre-school! That place was lit! I'm telling you nap time, and snacks! Oh it was paradise!"

"It was okay, but I mean the girls hadn't gone through puberty yet so-"

"Nobody cares Derrick!"

"I'm pretty sure they do Cammy!"

"My name is CAMERON! C-A-M-E-R-O-
N!"

"Geez okay, okay I get it CAMERON!"

"Thank you. All I wanted was some respect Derrick!"

"Wait, what? Respect? I'm not giving respect to someone who is dating Claire Stacey flipping Lyons!"

"What's wrong with Claire?!"

"Are you kidding me? She is like a leaky water faucet! Water gets everywhere if you don't fix it in time, and well, you know, it leaks!"

"I didn't understand anything that you just said!"

"I'm shocked! You, Cameron Fisher didn't understand what I said? Well he isn't the sharpest crayon in the box folks!"

"What? I'm not a crayon Derrick! I'm a human being!

"Cam?"

"What is it now Derrick?"

"You're an idiot."

"I am not an idiot! Oh and by the way Claire is not a leaking faucet!"

"Are you kidding with me? She cries everywhere she goes! Whenever we hang out with her I make sure to have a raincoat and some rain boots just in case! That girl should have a flood warning stamped on her back!"

"Ha-ha very funny! Claire doesn't cry everywhere!"

"Oh really? Just last week she started crying because she missed an episode of Some tv show!"

"Hey! That was her favorite tv show and she didn't record it. I would've cried too!"

"Oh give me a break! It's a tv show! She can watch the episode on the app or something."

"But it's better to watch it when it first airs!"

"IT'S THE SAME FUCKING THING!"

"No, it's not. Because by the time you watch it on the app everyone wi-"

"SHUT UP CAM! You're so boring even I can't make this autobiography funny!"

"Ain't that the truth. Hey what d-"

"Cam I have a question for you."

"What?"

"Do you still love nature despite what it did to you?"

"Oh you son of bi-"

"Cam you're just tense because you haven't gotten laid."

"What? I can get laid!"

"Cam, the only way you will ever get laid is if you crawl up a chicken's ass and wait."

"DER-"

"You know what I just realized?"

"No, what did the great Derrick Harrington realize?"

"We're out of time and you've said nothing about you or your life except that you're an idiot."

"Wait we're out of time? That can't be! And I'm not an idiot Derrick!"

"Yes you are! Well, my jobs done! Mission impossible: possible."

"Wait what was your mission?"

"To make sure you didn't finish this autobiography. Plus I also got free promo."

"Promo? For what?"

"Ladies and gentlemen check out my autobiography coming soon called Derrick's o-"

"What no! These people came here for my autobiography!"

"Say goodbye to the readers Cameron, because they are leaving you to go read my autobiography!"

"No! Wait I didn't finish!"

"Until next time folks!"

"Wait no please! I had so many notes! I had everything color-coded and everything! Give me more time I-"

"Goodnight everybody!"