Unpredictable

Undecided

That's not what I expected. Sure, Michaels sweet and very kind to me, but I never expect a promise ring. I plopped down on the same couch I sat on moments before but this time it felt different. I was glad Michael did this for me, but I can't promise myself to him when Luke still floats around my brain. I'd feel terrible buying a house, having a kid, and possibly marrying Michael, but wishing, secretly, that I was doing all this with Luke. The ring felt heavy on my finger, as if it was a anchor, weighing it down. I slipped it off and into my pocket.

"Miss, are you ok? You look kind of sick..." one of the assistants said to me, looking concerned.

"Oh, yeah yeah. I just need some air. Tell Michael I took a walk, if he comes back before me." I say as I jolt up and throw my jacket on.

I just need to get out of here without anyone seeing me. I mean, yes I'm glad Michael asked me, but the I feel like if this gets super serious, I'll hurt Luke. If I decide to not go with michael, I'll hurt him.

"Hey, hey, wait up!!" an far too familiar voice calls after me.

"Oh, hey Luke. What's up!" I say, trying to sound as cheerful as I can muster at this point.

"Ah, ya know, band stuff. Hey, are you ok? You don't seem as happy has you should be, about the whole Mikey thing." He said, as he looked down at me, into my eyes. His eyes looked so sincere, as if he actually still cared about how I felt.

I look down at the ground. I was trying my best for him not to see the tears welling up in my eyes. But he knew, that's what's so great about him, is that he could always tell when I was lying about being okay, while mikey just ignores it, like everything's good.

He pulled me into his chest, holding me, and rubbing my back. I broke down. I sobbed into the crook of his shoulder.

"it's just... I'm not sure.... he's great.... but then you.. and just fuck." I say between sobs.

"Baby, baby, shh, everything will be fine. I still miss you. Did you know that? I think about you constantly and when I see you with michael, it just, I'm sure, it hurts me." He muttered.

I look up into his beautiful blue eyes.

"I miss you too, Luke, a lot."

He leaned in and kissed me. I feel like that's the kiss that I've been needing for quite a while.

We separated but he still held on to my waist. 

"I mean, I like you, a lot, and sometimes I think that I actually love you. The problem though, is that I feel that same way about Michael, and I can't just choose between the two of you."

"Who says you have to choose right now? I mean we can keep this whole thing a secret for a while until you have it certain who you'd like to be with. Michael wouldn't have to know. I don't care if us being together is a secret, as long as I am with you."

I nod, and we kiss again before heading over to see the rest of the crew.