Damon opened the door to our room. I thought, "Could be worse." Or could it? I was sharing a room with Damon. I thought, "It can't be worse." It sucked knowing that I had to share a room with Damon, when just last night, Stefan let me go because of my unsure feelings for Damon.
Damon started to unbutton his shirt. "What are you doing?" I blurted out.
Damon grinned at me. I just wanted to slap that grin off his face. "Don't worry, Elena. It's nothing you haven't seen before."
Damon was right. It was nothing I haven't seen before. I mean, I saw Damon naked once, dripping wet, might I add. Oh, he looked really good that day. "What am I saying?!"
"What?" Oops. I guess I accidentally blurted that out. Thank goodness Damon couldn't get inside my head with my vervain necklace on. I would of been so embarrassed if he could hear what I just thought. I'm already ashamed thinking it.
"You know, Elena, I know you think I like this teasing game, but sometimes I just wish you'd tell me the truth."
"What are you talking about?" Uh oh. I knew exactly what Damon was talking about. I didn't want to talk about this now. There was too much going on now with Jeremy, and especially that Damon's beautiful body was staring at me, or, I was staring at it.
"I'm talking about us. Us, as in what are we?"
"We're friends, Damon."
"Thats the point. We're not friends, we can never just be friends." "I'm tired of pretending, or i'm tired of you pretending like you feel nothing for me." "And sometimes, I do feel like you don't feel anything for me." "And I just want to know the truth, so I don't waste my time loving someone who will never love me back."
I gulped. A big gulp. Damon sounded so mournful. I can tell he was starting to lose hope. But hope in what exactly? A relationship? I can never be in a relationship with my boy- or ex boyfriends brother. Thats just...wrong! But I knew it would be worse to lie to Stefan, my first love, and say I felt nothing for Damon. "Damon." Just saying his name, I feel so many different emotions. I feel love, hate, even death. But whats worse than that is, I feel alive.
"Stefan thinks I have feelings feelings for you."
Damon hesitated for a moment and said, "Do you?" Damon looked so hopeless, and innocent when he said those two words. He wasn't trying to act innocent, but he was at that moment. He just wanted to know the truth. He was tired of hoping and chasing me. He just wanted to know if there would ever be a future for us. I knew if I said no, he would definitely give up on us. But it's what I wanted, isn't it? I wanted him to let me go, so I can just be with Stefan, but thats not the right way to be with someone. Maybe, I didn't want Damon to lose hope. It was never Damon's choice, to let me go, but now I realize, it was my choice to decide who I wanted to be with.
(Pt.2 will be up tomorrow)
