The Mysteries of Life

Chapter 6

I don't know what to do with life anymore. I went from being a straight-A student to having D's and F's and seeing a counselor almost all week every freaking week. I feel as if I'm cheating myself and my friends. It feels like every word that comes up to my brain or out of my mouth is a lie. It's happened so much I can't tell what's real or not. I can't tell if my friends trust me. I can't tell whether or not I'm being played. I can't tell what's good for me anymore. I have tried things that shouldn't even be on a list of solutions. I have cut, strangled, and tried to commit suicide twice. I am tired of society's crap. I can never do anything without there being an obstacle. But I've been through enough obstacles already. Every single person I see thinks of me as an innocent girl with no issues at all or a loser who tries to fit in. NO!! That's not who I am. People judge others by their appearance. Well, guess what, take another freaking look at who you're talking to and figure out their problems before you start talking crap. And I know a lot of people like that. In my world, in my head is pitch black and there is a person who is banging and punching trying to get out and I've seen that person in my head trying to commit suicide. And I may sound crazy but I'm not. People don't know what it feels like to be in the position that I'm in. No one cares about what I go through. And I bet no one will give a crap if I'm dead.