Letters

11

To the guy who I changed my habits for,

You were the very start and end of my day.

I always looked forward to read your messages, i didn't care if it was a good morning, or a text saying why I stayed up so late last night. 

I don't care if you didn't reply to my message, all I cared was if you would reply. 

You get mad when I reply late, and I say sorry. 

I try my best to stay happy for you, since you didn't want me to be sad. 

But somedays, I breakdown and cry. I tell you all about it, and you accept my reasons. 

I changed my habit of staying up late, because it made you angry. 

I thought I didn't annoy you. 

Or so I thought I did. 

Last night was the night I wished never happened. 

You said I should be quiet. You asked if I could just stay silent for a few minutes. 

You were annoyed. I could tell. 

You pushed me away without a doubt, and in a heartbeat. 

You said I was important to you. 

I thought I was. 

This is painful for me to write, because the wound is still fresh. But what can I do? You were the highlight of my everyday routine. 

You were the reason why I fight my emotionally crippled heart. 

My heart was slowly being sewn back together, by you. 

But I didn't think that you'd be the one who'll cut the strings again. 

So here I am, once again. 

Staring at our conversation at 4 am. 

Back to my old habits. 

Thank you for the memories. 

I'll cherish it forever. 

-v.