Magikarp: Cream of the Crop

Chapter 1: Magikarp vs. Dragonite

"Magikarps for sale! Fresh Magikarps, right from the river and all set for buying!" the Magikarp salesman yelled from his poorly built stand, numerous Magikarp flopping around him. But try as he must, not one customer would stop by to examine or buying one of the useless Pokemon.

Spotting a businessman passing by who possibly had loads of cash, the Magikarp salesman snatched one of his stocks and ran in the path of the businessman. "Excuse me sir, but you merely must buy one of these Magikarps! When they lay eggs and produce more Magikarp offspring, you can sell them for a profit!" he explained, shoving in the businessman's face one of floundering Magikarps.

"Uhh... sir..." the businessman said, "I'm here with my children, please, get that sushi out of my face." He stepped out of the way, enlightening the children behind him, each with a Dragonite stuffed figure. Their eyes frightened by the evil seen in the eyes of this Magikarp salesman, the enthusiasm he showed in selling his products towards the people was outstanding.

"But your kids can also buy some Magikarp! I have a buy two get one free deal going on!" the salesman explained, pointing to the numerous Magikarps he had behind his stand. "Really, I'm practically giving them away! Buy them now before I'm out of stock!"

"As if I would like to purchase such a delicate creature like that. Besides, we're strictly a dragon type only family." He pushed the salesman out of the way, his children following close behind, hugging their Dragonite toys for dear life.

"Racists! Water types are also cool!" The salesman shouted at quickly retreating family. Now he stared dejectedly at the Magikarp floundering in his hands. "What am I going to do now? I have no more money, and I wasted all my time catching you useless fish? What am I supposed to do?" he asked the Pokemon, as if it could answer his question.

The Magikarp looked at his captor, staring deep into his soul, the guilt was over running his mind, breaking his mentality down.

"Magikarp," it said with a dry voice.

"Wait!" The salesman yelled at the almost gone family down the street. "What if my Magikarp beats your Dragonite? I'll give you five for free if you win! If I win, you have to buy five of them! Deal?"

The businessman walked back, a pokeball readied in his hand, "Mister, you got yourself a deal."

"Excellent! Magikarp, I choose you!" he yelled, throwing his Magikarp for battle. The water type Pokemon landed in between the pair and continued to flounder like a fish out of water... which it technically was.

"Go, Mister Puffins!" The businessman threw out his master ball, his Dragonite surrounding itself in a fiery aura, the ground's life being sucked in by it's lovely armour. The splendid dragon type Pokemon was not a force to be reckoned with, his level at 100 and his stats through the roof due to EV training (the most pretentious form of wasting your time battling Pokemon).

"Magikarp, use Splash!" The salesman shouted, his Magikarp using his power, slamming his water power into the fire lizard. It was uneffective, and Dragonite merely frowned in annoyance at getting wet.

"Mister Puffins, use Hyper Beam!" A ball of light began to form in Dragonite's mouth, getting larger and brighter until he released an almighty beam of pure 150 damage. The beam glared highly, a light that could be seen from the next town over, it burned those around it with its godlike force, and with a 90% accuracy, it hit Magikarp with the force of a nuclear projectile.

As for the poor water type Pokemon, Magikarp was blasted clear into the sky, disappearing into the great blue yonder in a twinkle of light resembling a star. A certain pair of dastardly villains would certainly be proud.

"Oh..." The salesman sighed with grief. There goes his profits for the day.

"Is that all you got?" The businessman gloated, his Dragonite smirking as well.

Well, it seemed the salesman pretty much lost the battle, on the grounds of his Pokemon being blasted off into oblivion. "No, you win," the salesman groaned. It was a pretty stupid idea to use Magikarp in a battle against a Dragonite. Actually, it was a downright idiotic move made in the heat of the moment.

"Yipee!" The businessman jumped in joy, he had finally accomplished his lifelong dream of winning five Magikarps with his overpowered Dragonite, it was such a challenge that even his children hugged their Dragonite plushies, filling their cold hearts with love and happiness.

But when the businessman ended his jump, he was shocked to discover the shack had a closed sign on it, all the Magikarp and the salesman mysteriously having disappeared.

"No... noooo!" The businessman fell to his knees, grabbing his hair and trying to rip it out as if it would solve anything.